2008 Roundup

I didn't really realize today was the LAST day of the year. Even though I have been thinking of what to do for New Year's for several days, I didn't really get that it was A NEW year. Really weird. It's always bizarre to think about things that happened at the beginning of the year, because you wouldn't believe they happened only twelve months ago.

This time last year: TMV went to Jackie's house and played cards on her living room floor on January 1st. I visited UCSD at the end of winter break and we played Bang every day.

Success of the year: Getting into Haas, becoming friends with my floormates after winter break (which I cannot believe was only a year ago)

Regret of the year: Getting a bunch of B's for the second semester of sophomore year and during the summer

Most played song of the year: The Parentheses by the Blow (154 times), but I suspect it may also be Benji Hughes - Waiting for an Invitation because I played that song a TON on youtube before I finally bought it on iTunes last week


Number of songs I added to my iTunes this year: 1,373

Best show of the year: In terms of best new show that I've gotten hooked on, Chuck. Which happened only a few weeks ago! Mad Men goes way over my head most of the time. Actually, cross that out. I MAY have started watching 30 Rock this year. So best new show of the year goes to 30 Rock but honorable mention to Chuck

Worst habit I've picked up this year: Coming back from the gym every morning and watching The Daily Show while eating a bowl of cereal before class. It's fun, but it's started a habit of watching online content to start my day. Plus, if The Daily Show really goes off the air (its destiny will be told in a few short hours), I wonder what would take its place. NEWS?!

Best purchase of the year: Airplane ticket back home for Veteran's Day

Total amount of my own money spent this year (since June): $7,747.41, not including school tuition, airplane tickets, or clothing my mom bought for me when I came back home

Obsession of the year: Trader Joe's hummus. And it's probably fair to say, Kristen Stewart for a few weeks.

Cool memory of the year: The Lookout, entering my apartment and being greeted by party steam, baked goods and my drunk RCSA friends, everyone coming to my birthday dinner at Ichima

Letdown of the year: Google Chrome, which kept crashing on me so I switched back to Firefox. Maybe one day I can own a laptop that doesn't go beserk when I open a browser window

Emotional rollercoaster ride of the year: Ending sophomore year and being really excited for summer. Hating summer - the living space, the fact that I was living alone, summer school, and work. Pledging to stay in school as long as possible so I could put off working a full-time job. Starting junior year and hating it. Deciding to graduate early so I could start working earlier in life.
honorable mention: figuring out that my old crush has a girlfriend now

Number of hours spent on the elliptical this year (at least, since August): 23 and a half hours. Just short of an entire day of stepping up and down on a machine

Number of laps swum this year (since August): 3,200

Things I wish I had known this year: That the economy would go to shit and maybe I should have pursued a double major on top of business. Although if I cannot get a job with a business degree, what other job could I possibly have gotten?

Hope for the new year: That I look back at 2008 and laugh at myself for worrying so much about getting an internship. That I share a little more of my "private life." That I make friends my age so I can actually celebrate my 21st birthday in Berkeley. That I get really fit and can wear my dream item: a simple, white long-sleeved shirt that is made of thin material.

Happy New Year everyone

Winter Song

If you have a heart, you will love this song and put it on your playlist after watching this video! So cute

Wanted: a friend

I do not have "a person." This is Grey's Anatomy's detached way of saying "best friend." I have people but I do not have a particular person. I have been wondering to myself, if I had some sort of big news, who is the first person I would tell? I cannot tell. (HAHA I meant that as "I can't figure it out," not some mysterious "I WILL NEVER TELL") I assumed it would be someone in TMV although I'm starting to wonder if I should not limit this person to TMV. But even if I had a non-TMV person, I would still have to have A person in TMV that I would tell things to first. Even though we rarely have full group gatherings, I wonder if most people would rather be told things with everyone present or if they want to be told individually. It is nice to be told individually, but only if you are one of the first to know.

I figure that "a person" is someone you tell important things to first, and you ask them how to deal with things because they know you best. Chrystal always knows exactly how I would react to a hypothetical situation, but I only go to her for advice and I never tell her about my personal stuff. There are other people who I would consider "my person," but I know that I am not their person, so it makes me hesitant to really make them "my person." If they are not going to tell me things first, then why should I tell them things first? It seems unbalanced.

Since Thanksgiving, I have changed my mind about who my person is like four times. It is weird because I feel like every year except this one, I have had a person. But I always thought of it as a person I spent a lot of time with. Now I am realizing that the people I spend a lot of time with may not necessarily be the person I would tell secrets to or whatever.

HAHA This is how I turn a blog into a three hour ordeal. Time to sleep. Christmas Eve is upon us. Sigh. Maybe I will find my person in the New Year. There is no rush I guess. I have no problem that needs to be solved and I don't think telling people about my thoughts would clear my head or anything.

A PMS inspired rant

I am pretty sure I am pms-ing right now. BUT WHATEVER. I'll rant if I want. Why do people call me or IM me and ask "what are we doing today?" If I had planned something, wouldn't I have fucking called you? And the way it's asked, it's like if there had been no plans, suddenly I am the one who is like "oh yeah, why don't we do this" and I have to plan everything when I was not the one who wanted to do anything in the first place. Why don't people call and say "hey I wanted to eat lunch here, would you be up for it?" Why don't you take a second to think about what it is you want to eat before you go around calling people? I feel like people get annoyed because it seems like we always do what I want. I feel like that makes me very controlling and selfish, but if everyone is always asking me what we are doing, it is obvious that we are going to be doing things that I want to do. So suck on that.

Chuck season one is kind of annoying. I am glad I watched season two first, otherwise I might not have continued watching it.

AGHHHH I WAS SO RIGHT. From now on, I am going to trust my instincts. LSJDFSLDFLSDF I cannot tell whether to be sad or happy. Those are two adjectives that are not the exact emotions that I am debating between, but I can't figure out what would be more appropriate adjectives. I feel like I won a bet with myself that I did not really want to win.

If my life were a TV show...

This song would play when I break up with someone that I still liked

Disney is EVERYWHERE

Yesterday I was searching for music and I came across some artist named Drake Bell. I really liked his song and downloaded four more off limewire. And then I figured I would look for similar artists so I went to last.fm. And I was incredibly horrified to find that his similar artists were Aly & AJ, The Jonas Brothers, and Ashley Parker Angel. Drake Bell is YET ANOTHER Disney artist. AGH

This is not the first time that I went "OMG! What a cool poppy song!" and then realized it was some young Disney star. I have been tricked by Aly & AJ, The Jonas Brothers, and Jordan Pruitt.


But how can you resist a catchy beat and melodic voice?

Chuck

NEW FAVORITE SHOW guys! Chuck is AMAZING. And proof that guest stars really work! I got sucked in because they had Jordana Brewster for a 3-episode arc. I watched one episode, and got really interested in the love triangle. Even after the Jordana Brewster character left, I was like OMG I MUST KNOW MORE.

I have watched a ton of tv in my life, where there are bajillions of tv couplings. But I have never been like "OMFG JUST BONE ALREADY!" Chuck and Sarah are such a cute couple! And every episode, there's always a moment, like "OMG IS THIS THE ONE?" but it never is.

Sarah, Yvonne Strechowski, is my new favorite TV blonde. HAHA sorry Kristen Bell. But you are no longer on tv, except as a narrator. She is Australian! But sounds so American. She is as kickass as Jennifer Garner in Alias, I swear.

They have really good music. I have to go look up the songs they play. But, OMFG they had an episode where they went to a high school reunion, and they played BSB and Paula Cole. You know it has to be a freaking good show when they can play Paula Cole's "I Don't Want To Wait" and you LIKE IT. WITHOUT having to picture Dawson's Creek in your head. THAT is a good show.

There is also an AMAZING number of guest stars on the show. In the few episodes that I've watched, there have already been SO MANY faces that I recognize. I LOVE recognizing faces.

Nicole Ritchie AND Ben Savage (Cory from Boy Meets World! who will probably look the same when he's 60) I actually believed that Nicole Ritchie could act after the episode. PLUS, she gets her ass kicked in by Sarah in a pretty amazing fight scene.


Any fight scene with Prodigy's "Smack My Bitch Up" is automatically cool. Please ignore the horrendous voiceover.

OC stars Rachel Bilson AND Melinda Clark!

And further proof that Chuck is as cool as Alias, there's Dixon and Marshall!

Since I haven't seen any of the first season, I didn't know that this character was added after the second season started. But if I HAD been watching episodes in the correct order, I'm sure I would have went OMG! when I saw his face...

BUSTER FROM ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT! Who is now a series regular. I think it's BIZARRE that his Chuck character sounds so similar to his Arrested Development character. I thought he was faking the voice but ... I guess ... it's his real voice.

I also freaked out when I saw the last episode (WHICH MADE ME TEAR UP!) when I saw CARL WINSLOW OF FAMILY MATTERS. OMG. Family Matters was like my childhood show. One of the MANY black family shows that I watched as a child. Seriously, I don't know how I ended up watching Sister Sister, The Smart Guy, Family Matters, The Jamie Foxx Show, and the Wayan Brothers as an eight year old, but it's certainly impacted my image of black people. He played a donut-eating cop on the episode, which made me laugh out loud. LOL!

I think that episode also has that alien guy from MIB. But I'm too lazy to see if it is. HAHA Brian does like a perfect impression of the alien guy from MIB.

And finally, see if you can spot the guest star here.

Ok, so it's not really a guest STAR. More like an actor just having a job as an extra. But still! It's Mr. Wu from Veronica Mars!

This post took up a LONG time. Just looking for pictures. I was going to go to the library and then get a gym membership. But now I don't feel like doing anything. FATNESS YAY

Chuck: Morgan! Do we carry any Rush cds in the store?
Morgan: No need, I've got them all on my Zune
Chuck: You have a Zune?!
Morgan: No, no HAHA I'll go grab my iPod

Finals time = Fun time

This sounds strange, but I think my favorite time of the school semester is finals time. It's the beginning to an end! And as long as I make a good study schedule and stick to it, I don't really stress out too much. My favorite thing is taking all the papers that I've accumulated and sorting out which ones I can use as scratch paper for the next semester. And then it's so satisfying to rip out all my class notes after studying.

The absolute best thing about this semester's finals was FREAKING CROSSROADS! I have been going ever since Wednesday, but I missed one day because I was too cold to leave my slightly warmer apartment. It's AMAZING. Crossroads is our dining commons and during finals week, they open it from 10-5am. It's so close to my apartment, it's warmer, there's internet, AND they have FREE drinks and baked goods. My stomach feels a little rounder after drinking like 12 cups of hot chocolate and eating muffins and pastries late at night. How is the dining system here SO COOL?

Ok, it turns out the outlet I've been sitting next to totally doesn't work. My battery life is about 30 minutes so I guess I basically came here to blog. I will just post this because it feels very awkward to blog while everyone else is studying.

Not So Silent Night

(You MUST play this before reading)

OMFG The Oracle arena is an AMAZING concert venue. NSSN WAS AWESOME. MAJOR MAJOR hearts to Franz Ferdinand, Bloc Party, and THE KILLERS. Death Cab and Jack's Mannequin were also there but OMGGGGG

I wish I had gotten to dance on the floor but then I wouldn't have seen the entire stage and the thousands of people. I should remember not to sing when I am recording because my annoying voice totally covers the music. HAHA I think Jon will kill me when he listens to his videos and hears my voice.

The lighting effects were SO GOOD. I am amazed by how quickly people can go in and out of the Oracle. I LOVE how it is CONNECTED to the bart station. I thought it would be insane to take the bart back, but there were tons of empty seats! It is nice to see a huge crowd of students, knowing that we are all Berkeley kids who just came from the same concert

I enjoy the small, moshiness of an Academy Is concert, and I've gotten to sit/stand like 10 rows away from the stage in a seated concert, and now I've gotten to sit REALLLY REALLY far away from the stage. All three are such fun ways to watch a concert. :D:D:D

OK. GRADES ARE NOW DOWN THE TOILET. I won't even try studying tonight. There's no way I can retain anything. I can barely type!

Another thing that I loved about this weekend. OMFG It's not even the weekend. HAHA But, I went to study at Crossroads yesterday, the dining hall. I went with some RCSA friends and it was SOO COOL. They open it until like 5am during finals, and even if you don't order anything, they put out all these baked goods and you can get free coffee/hot chocolate/cappucinos. Their hot chocolate is the BEST I have ever had, because there is a SHITLOAD of cream and it's extremely chocolately. I stayed yesterday until like 1am. SO FUCKING FUN. If you remember studying at Arcadia library with me during high school, it was a little like that. I actually got work done though. A very minimal amount of work.

I also had Ethiopian food yesterday. The lamb and salmon was really good but the beef was way too spicy. Ethiopian food is REALLY interesting to eat. I went with my RCSA ex-com, and it was SO perfect because Ethiopian is great for large groups. We all ordered something different and it comes all together on a huge plate and we just shared. I would have never been able to try so many dishes at the same time. I LOVE my ex-com! All of us are really into trying new things.

THESE PAST THREE DAYS WERE SOOOO GOOD. Tomorrow is another "fun day" too. WHY do I go out all during finals week?!

Other concerts I want to go to in my lifetime: Miley Cyrus, Paul Oakenfold or DJ Tiesto, Jimmy Eat World, and Britney Spears if she ever attains the performance ability she once had

"Fat people are the new tiny dog"

OMG I found ANOTHER video blog that I love. I had like two hours before I was supposed to go out for lunch, and instead of studying, I've decided to watch every episode of TV is the Answer on televisionwithoutpity.com

I LOVE video blogs. They are like tv shows. UNSCRIPTED. But not reality shows! I LOVE hearing people's opinions. If I could be anything, besides celebrity, I would want to be a video blogger. A successful video blogger. Because that means that I would be witty, people enjoy watching me talk, and I actually have some knowledge of the world.

I wish I could embed the video but if you are truly interested, you will have to take the effort to click on the link. I cannot tell which one is Val and which one is Beth. The one on the right reminds me of SOMEONE but I cannot place it. She seems like the kind of person I would want to be good friends with.

My study schedule should have started Saturday. But in those seven days, I would say that three of them consisted of me just sitting on a couch all day discovering youtube videos, and the other three, I just went out and had fun. Usually I set aside one FUN day so I can gear up for studying. But lately, FUN days seem to drag on until the actual TEST day, after which I have MOURNING week.

...

After watching like five more episodes since I posted, I think I realized ... the woman on the right reminds me of KRISTEN STEWART. If Kristen Stewart were more amenable to humor. But kind of looks like Jenna Fischer to me.

Gosh darn it

I really was not planning on blogging. I was actually just checking my blog and I thought to myself "I would like to not blog until maybe Thursday." But sometimes when I read someone else's blog it makes me want to blog.

I will maybe write a little bit and then try to finish studying. So the prior weekend, I didn't study very much because it was one of those weird times where you can't study too early, because you wouldn't remember the material when the final comes around. So Friday-Sunday, I sat around the apartment a lot and didn't really care that I would learn one little thing every two hours. But NOW I'm kind of screwed because my exam is tomorrow and when I was reviewing things, I didn't remember like half of it. Fuckers. I also have to take the sample exam which I should have done by noon today. The exam is in twelve hours. I can't believe I wanted an A+ in accounting. Now I'm like "I hope I don't get an A-"

I get random cycles of loneliness. I am in one right now. Oddly, I think I get more lonely after something majorly fun happens in my life. Probably because the following days, I will do nothing and then I wonder "why can't my life just always be that fun?"

I feel like it is very hard to meet people in college. I kind of go through life with the perspective of "I probably will not see them again so it's ok if I don't get too close to them" which seems logical but it's probably faulty logic. I'm the type of person who makes few, but very close friends. I wouldn't want to be the kind of person who is friends with everyone, but only has superficial relationships. But I do wish I could have an additional group of friends in college. That sounds greedy. I have like, two groups, but one of them consists of people who are all older than me. And the other is people all younger than me, and most of them are going abroad next year. So I am thinking, what am I going to do next year?

I am listening to Paramore right now. I uploaded two of their cds onto my iTunes. All of their songs sound the same. I also need to pee but I hate getting out of this sofa because it is so cold and my toilet seat will be even colder.

I think, everything they say about Haas is true. And there are more ugly truths that are not said. But the main thing I'm thinking of is that "people in Haas are Haas-holes." I agree with it. I know that I am one too. I am cocky about being in Haas and sometimes I do feel a sense of entitlement. It is hard not to, when they throw all this free shit at you the second you get in, and then all the professors say things like "YOU'RE HAAS. Employers want you. You'll do fine."

I look around the classroom and I'm always like ... I don't want to be friends with any of these people. Which is very strange because I actually have a significant handful of Haas friends, but I became friends with them before getting into Haas. I know them through Li-Ting, who knew them from PBL. Whenever I meet new people associated with this group, they are like "are you PBL? RCSA? Or TBG?" Anyway, I think all of THOSE people are some of the nicest people ever. So there HAS to be more like them out there, sitting in those Haas classrooms. But I never get that sense of "hey, I could be friends with that person" when I look at people

Instead, I just see 1) overly confident, competitive people who are probably going into consulting because they don't know what they want to do in life, beyond wanting to make lots of money 2) fobby people who hang out in their own fob groups and are probably all going into finance 3) people who try too hard and seem really uppity and 4) people who just don't seem to care and are probably not in Haas

I get the feeling that in other majors, if you want to make friends, you make friends because ... you want friends. But in Haas, it just seems like you make friends to network. You make friends because you want information about jobs, or because you want to share homework solutions, or because "you never know when you might need someone." Every time I talk to a friend about how I haven't really made good friends in Haas, they are like "you really should though. You never know when they'll help you in the future." It's annoying because it's true. Do people even think like that in other majors? Maybe they do sometimes, but even then, it's probably not said so blatantly.

Despite my ranting, I assume this would not even be an issue for me if I HAD become close friends with some Haas people. I'd just be like "oh friends! YAY!" I think my problem is that thus far in life, I have enjoyed success through my own efforts. Some people, in high school, were able to do well because they made good friends who helped them out or sucked up to the teachers who always gave them a break. I think the number of those kinds of people increases when you get into college, and increases exponentially in Haas. I've always been kind of uncomfortable with that - doing well when it wasn't 100% your effort - but it is ridiculous to think that you can do everything yourself. Put very bluntly, I hope I can learn how to use people because you can only get so far in life by your own efforts. At some point, and I think that point begins with recruiting, it's who you know and what they can do for you.

Superhuman power

Right now, at this moment, if I could have any superpower, it would be the power of telekinesis. I'm sitting at my dining table, studying. These past few days have been incredibly cold. I swear, it's colder in my apartment than outside sometimes. The table is right next to our bay window, which makes for very poor insulation. I'm wearing socks, "warm" slippers, gloves, a sweater, and I've wrapped a giant blanket around myself, and somehow I'm still cold.

If I had telekinetic powers, I'd be able to control my computer and turn the pages of the textbook with my mind. Unfortunately, I have to leave my arms exposed to the cold to do this the ordinary way. :(

But if it were any other weather, I'd still want the ability to dictate my metabolism.

I do not enjoy eating yet I am hungry all the time. Conundrum! I plan to eat out very rarely before I go home, because I want to save all my money for Arcadia.

I think my love for hummus has ended. What shall be my next food craze? They seem to get progressively healthier and healthier

Freshman year: Granola bars
Sophomore year: Yogurt and granola
Junior year: Hummus
Senior year: Unknown.

I keep dragging out my study sessions. What should take an hour to read ends up taking five hours. I can't help but listen to my iTunes. And when a good song comes on, I look for cover songs on youtube. They aren't good enough to put on my iTunes, but they are good enough to waste my precious study time


Very interesting way of singing Dakota by Stereophonics


Her voice is amazingly similar to Jaymay



I realized that I particularly like cover songs when sung by the opposite sex. It makes them automatically different and not as immediately comparable to the original.

WHY AM I WASTING TIME?

I've lost a glove! My right hand will be exposed to the deathly cold. FROSTBITE!

I totally forgot about that

I was reading gofugyourself.com and it reminded me of the time ...

this happened.

HAHAHA OMG. It's been like three months since her real comeback (opening at the MTV video awards; note, NOT the performance at the MTV video awards) and eighteen months since her first attempt to come back (her performance at House of Blues)

I think so much crazy has happened in her life that I completely forget most of it. There are times when I don't even remember that she has kids or was married to Kevin Federline. Why I think about her at all, I cannot explain.

No matter how high of a comeback she gets, I think there will always be some craziness in her. Her story makes me want to be in Hollywood more, so I can see if it would affect me the same way. Although I would never want to attain her level of popularity. I want more of an Amy Adams or Rachel Mcadams level of fame.

Today has been an incredibly unproductive day. Which explains why I am blogging about Britney Spears.

Never say no

Today was amazingly fun, especially considering I thought today was going to be painfully dragged out. I went to Paulo's birthday celebration today, which was eating at a Mediterranean restaurant in SF and then ice skating. I woke up today not wanting to get out of bed. After delaying for half an hour, I got up at 8:00 and dragged my ass to the gym. Then, I was going to do homework but instead I went to eat Crepevine with Jon, Paulo, and Victoria as a HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Paulo.

Came back and we just hung around the apartment. I started cleaning and I was halfway through sweeping the floor when I realized I was going to be late for class. I ditched and decided to go to the one a later one. After class I came back and called Caroline. After much delay and false starts (I had to go back to the apartment twice because I forgot things), we left for SF early.

On the bart ride, I already knew it was going to be a very tiring day. I just wanted to sit and sleep on the Bart. We arrived at Powell (it's been a very long time since I took the bart to Powell) and shopped. We didn't get anything. The sales are not as good as the news claims. Maybe because it's Friday. The only store that seemed to actually have the highly publicized discounts was FCUK, and I didn't want anything from there.

After trudging around SF, Paulo and the gang arrived. We went to the restaurant, which was pretty good. I regret ordering the lamb shank because it turned out to be a GIANT ASS piece of leg lamb. I do not know what a shank is. The potatoes were crazy buttery. But whatever - now I know. There was a belly dancer in the restaurant. Very strange. Harold, Paulo's best friend, had got him a cake from Coldstones. It was pretty good, but I bet if I had known beforehand that it was Coldstone's, I wouldn't have liked it.

Then we walked a little bit to the ice rink and skated for an hour and a half. I wish I could do tricks or skate backwards. Just to have some bragging rights. But at least I was lucky to have ice skated as a child.

We were crazy tired and managed to catch one of the last Barts back to Berkeley. I can't imagine what would happen if we had missed it.

Then I went back to my apartment. The hilarious thing is that I was simultaneously "hosting" a party that I wasn't at. RCSA ex-com had wanted to do a party, but no one offered a place. I was going to this birthday bash, so I thought there was no reason to do it at my place. But things got desperate and I was like FINE we can do it at my place. Turns out it was AWESOME.

I was seriously considering just going home and crawling into bed but the second I opened the door, I saw ALL these familiar faces (and quite a few unfamiliar ones) and I just went around and did the WHOO girl thing, going "KRISTENNN! NAOMI!! ANDRIA!" and so on. I have never been so delighted to be greeted with that familar blast of warm party air and loud music. I ended up catching the tail end of the party, but it was still super fun. I love that people were like PLAY YOUR MUSIC! It makes me feel good when people like my music, even though my "party mix" includes songs like destiny's child - bootylicious and journey - don't stop believing.

I love this group of friends. I love all my friend groups. In the very end when people were leaving, some stayed behind and helped me clean :) There is a SHIT load of alcohol left on my table. Kristen is picking it up tomorrow for our January retreat. HAHA It had been my committee's idea to have a bakeoff, where each committee gets together and bakes something and then all committees get together and eat it. So I thought it was super cute that I looked in my living room and on my coffee table was ALL THESE DESSERTS. I have some leftover, but they are all crazy sweet and I do not plan on eating them.

People were like "eat that one, it's rich but delicious" and I was proud to say "THAT'S MY FUNDRAISING COMMITTEE'S WOOT" I realized yesterday that I LOVE my committee. I need to do more things with them next semester. They are THE nicest people EVER - all four of them. We made a brownie cheesecake. I am horrified to know what goes into making a cheesecake after last night.

Now my apartment looks pretty clean again. I need to wash towels and my bath mat tomorrow, and swiffer the floor, but other than that, it is wonderfully clean. Dare I say, possibly even cleaner than before the party.

This will make me sound religious, but I feel very blessed to have friends in Berkeley. I have my floormates from last year - small but very tight knit. I have my RCSA friends from this year, and I have my RCSA friends from last year and their friends that I later became friends with. There are so many awesome personalities that I may not have gotten to know.

I did not expect to go to sleep being so happy, but I am. :) Yay life

Reasons my apartment is crazy awesome for parties:
1) the living room is ridiculously huge
2) hard wood floors
3) large living space overall
4) cops don't come knocking because you can barely hear music outside the apartment
5) close to food if needed
6) SIZE again.

SO TIRED. And happy. Based on my life rule of "FUN ALL THE TIME WHEN ASKED," I guess I WILL watch the football game tomorrow with friends. Whoops, sorry finals. Another time.

I wish every day were today

The euphoria has died down by now but OMFG. My presentation went FREAKING WELL. We got a fucking ONE HUNDRED PERCENT PLUS he gave us an extra point to our class participation, since we were a two person team. That is MAJOR, a point anywhere really makes a difference. OMFG. I could not stop smiling for like two hours. I celebrated by eating a chocolate glazed donut. I then promptly ate an apple because the oil in the donut started to give me a stomachache.

But YES. There were SO many things going against us: 1) this was my partner's first presentation in English 2) we were a 2 person team instead of the usual 3 and 3) we hadn't had very much time together because of Thanksgiving.

But then today SO many things went well for us. We did teacher evals today (now I kind of think I shouldn't have written, "The standards are impossible and the class made me regret going into Haas") and he allowed us to show a clip of BMW Films. What would have been like a 40 minute long Q&A session thankfully got cut to a 20 minute one.

I am SO freaking happy. I hope that my briefs turned out ok so I can relax and know for sure that I won't be getting a B- in the class.

Today is the best day. I just finished my presentation and it's like THE DAY before I really have to start thinking about finals. LET THIS DAY LAST FOREVER!

Two more days

Two more days until my marketing presentation. I just want to skip to the hour after the presentation. Ugh. Actually, an hour after the presentation I will be nodding off in my microeconomics class. So I want to skip to two hours after my presentation.

Things I plan to do after my presentation:
- celebrate that the last stressful thing I have to worry about this semester is over
- mourn over the likelihood that my presentation grade will not save me from a B- in the class
- go swimming
- finish Twilight
- have fun at Paulo's birthday party
- go to 4th street on Saturday
- go grocery shopping
- have a long conversation with a friend
- start writing cover letters
- edit my resume
- make a study schedule for my microecon, accounting, and marketing finals

My list looks like a lot more homework but I'm actually looking forward to occupying my mind with something besides BMW

Diet and exercise

http://music.msn.com/music/celebrityfeature/celebrity-bikini-shots/?GT1=BUZZ1

What a hilariously opinionated MSN.com article

Time to exercise! I want this week to be over. RIGHT NOW.

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WEIRD. I just came back from the gym. I usually go in the morning before classes, around 8:30-9:30 but today I went after class from 11:30-12:30. There are totally different people who go to the gym at these times (something I've noticed before) but I was just reminded of it today.

5:00-7:30: I have never gone to the gym this early so I wouldn't know
7:30-9:30: A lot of realllyyy old men, and a lot of younger white college females
11:00-2:00: A lot of white women who are in their late 20s-late 30s, slightly more Asian females who look more bookish, and more Asian males who look like "nice guys"
3:00-5:30: I have never gone at this time, but I've heard this is when all the athletes train, so I assume it's a lot of athletic looking white people
5:30-6:30: Based on my observations as I walk to the swimming pool, it's a lot of bulky white guys. Probably leftovers from the athlete training
9:00-closing time: TONS of Asians. A lot of douchier looking Asian guys, who I assume want to work out but are the kind who wake up too late to go in the morning, and more Asian girls who look like the kind of girls who go out with the Asian boys. It's also disgustingly warm and stuffy in the gym by this time. I can't believe I spent my freshman year going to the gym at night

Oh of course

Of course, I leave my gmail on my web browser for the past six hours and never closed it. And then I log into blogger, subsequently logging me out of gmail, a second before I realize I needed to check my mail. HATE! I don't understand how to link my gmail account to this blog, instead of having to sign in with my yahoo account. You'd think the three second inconvenience would be inconsequential, but it makes me hate blogger a little more each time I sign in.

I think I watched too many Kristen Stewart interviews last week because today I found myself constantly running my fingers through my hair, trying to make it more voluminous. And now it's a lot more oily than it was in the morning.


A better song could have been used.

I think I am supposed to leave for Berkeley at 5. I have yet to finish my presentation, although I only have one more slide left. I have to make a calendar, but I do not know how to make one like the presenters before me did. I plan to just e-mail it to my partner and tell him to do it. But I don't know if I trust his artistic capabilities. I have a nagging sense than I did not cover all of my bases. I wish I had made a good business friend in marketing, who would sit through my presentation and point out all the flaws. Even if I practice with my friends, none of them understand the intensity of UGBA 106's Q&A session.

I cannot believe it's December 1st. I hate it when important things take place at the beginning of the month and they creep up on you. I will devote the next three days to this marketing presentation. And then celebrate the weekend by going to Crate and Barrel and seeing if they have massive sales.

SECRETS!

Thanksgiving was funnish. I had two excellent dinners, bought a bunch of stuff I actually like, and had long convos with people. But by 2:00 today I felt very tired and just wanted to stay in. Too much going out. I'm an old lady. I didn't accomplish very much for my marketing presentation (SO FUCKED) but it's only 9:30 (at time of publishing, now 10:30). It feels like it should be 2:30 though. What a long night it will be. It's one of those projects where, in the beginning, you think it's going to be easy, but the more you do, the more it becomes like "WTF I have absolutely no idea what I'm supposed to do."

I always want to do something when I go home but I don't. And then I regret it when I go back to Berkeley. I came close today, but not yet. Maybe next time.

I feel like my parents like each other more now. I think they are proof that if you don't like a person, if you stay with them for about twenty-five years, you might get so used to their annoying habits that you end up liking them.

Reality Show Rants

My favorite reality tv show character! That I can remember at least. I've seen a lot of reality shows and I generally forget about them once the season is over.

She got voted off last week though, which PISSES me off. This show is TOTALLY flawed. A good reality show has to have characters you can root for and characters you want to take down. The season goes well if in the end, you have the likable characters remaining. If you have a season where only the unlikable characters are remaining, you're not going to have a very excited audience because there's no one to cheer for in the last few episodes.

The Biggest Loser, like most reality shows, splits them up into teams and then half way through, they compete individually. But they always wear colored shirts, blue for those trained by Bob and black for those trained by Jillian. Unlike other reality shows, for some reason, after the splitup they still function as if they were on teams, and it's expected of them to ALWAYS vote for someone of a different colored shirt, unless the bottom two performers are from the same team, in which case you have no choice but to vote for either one. There is no reason for them to continue voting with the team, because it's INDIVIDUAL! You have equal chances of being the bottom two, and all reward challenges are invidivual at this point anyway.

But when someone goes against the team, everyone acts like it's some major backstabbing move, when it's NOT! There's no reason to be loyal to someone, especially if you have the opportunity to vote off the biggest bitch in the house who is just going to vote your ass off when she gets the chance ANYWAY. They reason that they need to "keep the numbers," meaning get the majority so they're safe. But there's no reason to keep the majority based on team color, beyond a few weeks of false security, because once you eliminate one side, you just start eliminating your own group. If you're already split up at this point, I think people have to start thinking about 1) who is their biggest competiton in the long run and 2) who they think is deserving of the reward, and just say "screw the team" if it comes to it.

People make alliances in the beginning within their team, which makes sense and although I think it's a little unfair in this particular show, I'd say it's ok. It is still a game. But I find it ridiculous when competing individually, person A keeps person B when they have NO alliance together, and person B has a horrible personality and has posted a REVENGE BOARD for person A. WTF.



If you are in a reality show here is how elimination should go:
1. First two weeks - you have no idea what anyone is like, so you vote for the person who was the most annoying that week and made some unfortunate comment
2. You start making alliances and someone will lead the pack and decide who to vote for. There will be someone who is either particularly annoying, someone who isn't pulling their weight and doesn't deserve to be there, or more rarely, someone who is CLEARLY going to win the game so you vote them off early before they end up dominating the rest of the game
3. The show is suddenly split up individually, but for that week you still vote with your team because no one really knows what's going on
4. You start voting depending on how it will affect YOU and not how it will affect your "team." You obviously vote against people who are out to get you, or you vote for someone who is unlikely to vote along with you in coming weeks.
UNLESS.
You could be the swing vote and are currently on the majority. But the majority is filled with game players who, while they have played the game well and managed to make a majority, are actually the worst human beings on the show and possibly the worst people you have ever met. In this case, YOU FREAKING GO AGAINST THEM.

Why? Because if you are the swing vote, this means you're NEXT on the chopping block when the majority finishes off the minority. If you're not going to win, you might as well help someone who you would feel better about winning go a little farther, rather than someone who is a terrible person.

From the subtext of the show, it seems like the only reason they continue voting by teams is because their trainers tell them to. Contestants have said "Bob has a rule - never vote for someone on your team." The benefit for him is that it increases his chances of someone from HIS team winning, giving him more bragging rights. But it doesn't benefit the contestant AT ALL. UGH!

I am clearly far too invested in my television shows. I kind of want to eat pie. HAHA

Keyboard Shortcuts

I can't believe I'm writing a blog entry when I have YET to start my environmental sciences paper. AGH! I don't think I can finish it tonight, at least not if I want a gibberish-free paper. :(

My Logitech mouse has not been working well the past week so I just stopped using it. I'm pretty sure it's because I kept banging the USB connector against the wall when I took my laptop in and out of the bathroom (so I can play music when I shower, not so I can do weird stuff with my computer in the bathroom), so now something is messed up. I need to start keeping ALL of my receipts, because I could have sent it in for warranty but I am certain I threw the receipt and box away.

I've been slowly picking up some keyboard shortcuts and I LOVE learning how to use them. It would be awesome if I were able to do EVERYTHING mouse-free, but I don't know if that is possible. I would have to figure out how to navigate different menus without clicking but I don't know where to go after pressing the button with a menu and mouse pointer on it.

My favorite shortcuts are:
Alt + Tab which lets you switch between programs. I think the large icons are very cute
F5 which is refreshing the page
Control + R, L, or E for different justifications on Microsoft Word, which I LOVE to do without having to search for the icons
Control + T for a new tab on the web browser

I bought a CD for FULL PRICE today. It's a little sad how long I debated whether or not to buy a real CD that was not preowned. The cd that gets this distinction for the first time in several years is The 88 - Not Only ... But Also. I have been meaning to buy this CD for a long time, but when I saw its album cover displayed on Rasputin, I couldn't leave without it. It was only $7.73 which was fairly cheap.

Wasting time by thinking about life

This is completely 100% an attempt to delay work on my environmental sciences final paper. It was supposed to be half completed yesterday but I ended up watching Speak. Which, the entire time I was watching it, I was thinking "why does this movie sound so familiar?" and then I realized it's based on a book I had read. I'm glad Kristen Stewart's resume is so limited, otherwise I'd be wasting even more time watching her movies. (No more pictures of her because I'm quite close to weird teenage girl fan crush status) I finished my case study paper on Russia but now I've gotten so sick of writing the word environmental that I don't want to do anything else. But I had really planned on finishing my final paper before Thanksgiving, so I could come back from break and only worry about three classes. Also, I get the pride and glory of saying I finished a paper two weeks before its due date.

I want to go home NOW! I never used to get homesick for Arcadia, probably because I liked living in the dorms more. I wouldn't say I'm homesick, but I look forward to going home a lot more now. Before I would only be excited to see TMV, but now, *GASP* I'm actually excited to see my parents as well. I enjoy going home and eating this red bean pancake thing that my mom buys every time I go home. I like how clean and uncluttered my room is - it feels kind of like a hotel room because I can just throw my suitcase on the ground and for however long I'm home, my clothes just end up spread out on the floor.

Now, I take joys in little things, like being able to walk around on barefoot or showering in a large bathroom, or my Dad happily washing dirty dishes for me. Although I always get a little pissed when I look at myself the next day, it's funny how my mom ALWAYS buys a new carton of ice cream whenever I'm coming home, just so she can eat some too. I like having the option of running at the AHS track, although I haven't done so since the summer, I think.

After visiting UCSD for Veteran's Day I was really contemplating whether I would rather live in SD or SF when I graduate. After last week's adventures around SF, it's an unequivocal vote for San Francisco. The food, the financial district, the views and the CRAZY culture that is SF - how can you want to leave? I don't know why so many SF events entail nudity, but it's hilarious.

I am really looking forward to the day when I can move into a clean, modern-looking apartment building. I wonder if I would be living alone. When I picture my future, I imagine living by myself, which seems so luxurious. It would be AWESOME to do everything MY way. My living situation is not terrible now - one of my apartmentmates is a lot messier than I would like, but whatever. Knowing other people's situations, at least their personalities are likable. But there are so many little things that I wish people would do, like can you SQUEEZE the sponge, or can you DRY YOUR FEET before stepping on the bathmat, but they're so little that there's no point in telling people, otherwise I'd just come off as crazy.

I want to be able to go home to MY OWN place, throw my shit on the sofa and just play music as loudly as I want. I want to be 100% certain that I am cleaning up a mess I made, and I like the idea of cleaning after myself, and knowing that when something becomes dirty again, it's because of MY actions and not someone else's. I can have a fridge of only MY food, my apples, my hummus, and my carrot sticks. Also, I wouldn't have to have a backup towel in the bathroom for the MANY times that I forgot to bring my towel.

But then I always wonder about how lonely I will feel. I already lived completely alone for the summer, and along with the idea of "I WANT TO PROLONG SCHOOL AS LONG AS POSSIBLE," I had reached the now forgotten conclusion of "DON'T EVER LIVE ALONE." After staying at Connie's apartment, I realized how difficult it would be to have a dog if I were living alone, especially if I am at work all the time. I think it's very fun to come home hungry after a long day of school and say "JON I'M HUNGRY" and we go off to eat. Or it's midnight and I say "JON I'M HUNGRY" and we think about what we want to eat. But other than companionship, and Chrystal pointed out safety, I want to live alone!

Of course, this is a moot point if I end up not getting the job I want, and I don't have the money to live alone anyway.

More Kristen Stewart related stuff

I could have probably finished my environmental sciences paper by now but instead I watched In the Land of Women. It is one of those movies that has to deceive audiences by having a trailer that makes it look like a typical boy falls in love with girl movie after a cute courtship and a dramatic fight, when they actually don't even end up together and were never meant to be coupled to begin with.

Watching the movie made me sad that I did not have the same luck in genes as Kristen Stewart does. Should I post another picture? Sure why not. Maybe it will make my male readers happier.


Apparently Twilight was the largest opening weekend for a female director. Here is a quote from a Yahoo! article (don't judge me - I also read nytimes.com!)

"Teen girls rule the earth," said Paul Dergarabedian, president of Media By Numbers. "If you look back at the ` Hannah Montana' movie , how well that did, and now this movie, the teen girl audience will never be ignored again or underestimated. It was always teen boys who were the coveted ones, but someone finally caught on to the idea that girls love movies, too, and if you create something that they're into, that they're passionate about, they will come out in big numbers and drive the box office."

I'm not a huge feminist or anything but WOW. I already knew about the disappointing lack of movies that are directed or focused on women or minorities - or at least, the lack of movies that are greenlighted. I guess it's a good thing that someone is acknowledging this, but the quote kind of rubs me the wrong way. Yeah, THANKS to that SOMEONE out there who SUDDENLY realized women actually HAVE money and are able to SPEND IT. Can you imagine WOMEN having BUYING POWER? WOW. I guess we have to put out more movies directed at girls then, because SHOCKER they have an impact.

Ok. It is 10:58. I should write my paper. I know I am procrastinating because I am scared I won't be able to hit the seven page minimum page limit. I could add another topic but I really do not want to spend more time researching Russia's environmental issues. I wish I did not have to know so much about a foreign country. It hurts my brain.

It's Early Thanksgiving!

Today is the day of Cal's Big Game against Stanford. For the first time since I've been at Berkeley, I went to the bonfire rally. It was kind of cool but felt reallyyy dragged out. It's nice to say I've been to one though. It was INSANE getting in - there was a huge line but Paulo was calling Caroline and Joe and they told us to just come to the front since they had tickets. I can't believe we were actually able to see them when we got to the front. They were holding out tickets for us and this random girl mistook them for her own friends and was like "OMG THANKS!" and there was a huge awkward moment before she was like "oh wait ... sorry!"

So today I woke up and it felt SO THANKSGIVINGish! I think because there's football in the air, and we were going to Caroline's to watch the game. Jon and I went to Trader Joe's to buy salsa and chips and Caroline was making muffins, so it felt like a precursor to a Thanksgiving feast. HAHA

While Caroline was making muffins she was like "can one of you run to the store and get me some milk?" and Paulo was like "i will" and I burst out laughing because it seemed SO family like. And Jon is sitting on the ground making cute signs for tonight's volleyball game (I <3 Cutura #26) and (MARRY ME #3).

It's third down right now! I think I'm going to miss the end because I have to go to a meeting soon >=(

So much work to do! I can't believe I've done SO LITTLE. I keep pushing back things. Boo boo. My earlier post said I was going to miss a volleyball game, the bonfire rally, another volleyball game, and the football game. But I've actually ended up going to every single one of them. At the cost of my GPA.

Thanksgiving soon! I'm excited.

Kristen Stewart

Even though Connie L bought me Twilight for my birthday (THANK YOU!) I guess I'm totally out of the loop because I didn't notice that it's this "huge phenomenon." I totally don't get how it became so famous. There is always someone trying to put a twist on the vampire story that I don't really notice any of them anymore. I think I kind of combined Moonlight and Twilight into one thing in my head. But lately I've been noticing a huge surge in mentions to some guy whose name I don't remember - Robert Patterson? Who plays the vampire and I know he is Cedric Diggory from Harry Potter, and Kristen Stewart.

This whole time I have also combined Kristen Stewart with Kimberly Stewart into one person. I vaguely remember that Kimberly Stewart is friends with Paris Hilton. So I was kind of befuddled as to why so many people were paying attention to Paris Hilton's BFF.

But FINALLY I actually watched an interview with Kristen Stewart and realized: she is totally not Kimberly Stewart. Silly me for thinking Paris Hilton was friends with a respectable person. I still don't really get the excitement over the books and most of the people who comment on the books say something along the lines of "they're not very well-written but I couldn't stop reading them."

Most of all, I don't get the appeal over Robert Patterson. Why is he so pale? Is it preparation for the Twilight sequels? And why does Kristen Stewart look SO angry all the time? I've been trying to find the interview that made me interested in looking for more Twilight stuff in the first place, but I can't remember where I read it. Basically it was something where she said she couldn't understand what the huge appeal was, and she kind of dissed the people who are obsessed with the books.

And EVERY interview I watch her in, she has this Look that's like "I fucking hate going on these media circuits." I think she sounds very smart in her answers, but they're all very carefully worded and there still seems to be a subtext of "I hate my character and think she's a complete idiot and if I had known what a huge annoyance it would be to become famous, I would not have done this part to begin with. Also, I hate my costar so I will fidget here and constantly run my fingers through my incredibly volumnous hair until this damn interview comes to an end."

I thought she just hated Meredith Viera at first, but the more interviews I watch, the more I'm convinced: she totally hates Hollywood.


I thought she looked very pretty in this interview, and she couldn't run her hands through her hair because it's tied back so tightly. She kind of dresses like Frannie, I think. :D


I could barely finish this interview, it's so painfully strained

I think she's first "rising star in Hollywood" that doesn't seem like a mindless idiot.

Getting close to broke

Back from SF! I LOVE my black dress. As expected, I do not like my heels. They look cute I guess, but I think I have to poke another hole in the strap because it's too loose. So I went to Supperclub with my friends from RCSA. Supperclub is ... not easy to put into words.

To sound totally juvenile, I GOT DRINKS and didn't get carded! Awesomeness. And the servers there were like "what's the occasion? are you guys coworkers?" which is COOL. I am out of the college student segment. :D The bar was really nice and the bartender was very cool looking. It would be interesting to learn how to bartend.

So the lounge is like ... a room and instead of tables you lie on these white beds. It's a three course entree and I thought the food was very good. It wasn't as snotty as I thought it would have been. Our waitress was normal but the amount of strange there was off the charts. I feel like it was totally San Francisco. There was a man in a skintight rabbitsuit and the first words I heard him say were "MY PENIS IS ON YOU! MY PENIS IS ON YOU!" to the lady next to us. When he came over to our party and basically lied on our legs, I saw him rubbing Kristen's knee for an exceedingly long time. HAHA Then there was a group of people dressed in drag or clownish outfits and it seems like their jobs are basically to sit around, drink, talk, eat, and occasionally pretend to have sex with each other. Seems like a fun way to earn money.

The food is really good - the soup was creamier than I usually like, but it definitely filled me up. I don't really know what we had, but I heard the words celery and scallop. But it kind of tasted like my palak paneer. Then we had this beef thing with potatoes and vegetables that had a really good sauce on them. I heard the word Thai. HAHA And then we had a REALLY good dessert that was like ... some sort of ... not ice cream but something sweet and scooped, with a wafer and something kind of like a chocolate souffle with sauce. I heard the words pistachio and mint.

Only downside - I'm out $60. But it was a pretty well spent $60 - lots of interesting memories. In the middle of dinner, we had A SHOW where this fairly naked guy did the most AMAZING THINGS on a trapeze swing. At one point, he was hanging on it with the BACK OF HIS NECK. CRAZY.

I was supposed to go clubbing tomorrow but I think I've been going out too much. BOO BOO. I don't think I'll have another chance to get into an over 21 club until I'm actually 21. Sigh. I'm ALSO missing out on the bonfire rally, a volleyball game, AND the football game. LKJDFKLDSJFLDSf WHY did I have to have a presentation for marketing SO LATE? I could have gone to ALL OF THESE if I didn't feel guilty about getting a shit grade.

I've decided that I AM going to take back my job at Equilar. Pros: money, it gives me something to do, and this way I have a backup for graduation. Cons: my eyesight will go down, I should probably be concentrating soley on recruiting

Quote of the day:
Kristen: Where did you learn how to twirl a baton?
Gay man in bunny suit: I taught myself. I taught myself a lot of things. I taught myself how to sew ... how to suck dick ... and how to twirl a baton

"I wish life were like driving on a bridge all the time"

That makes no sense, but I'm extremely tired. I've been out since 1:00 and just got back and showered (it's almost 1am now). How much money did I spend today? $181.62. Holy fucking shit. It's not even Black Friday yet. This month's expenditures chart is going to make me want to kill myself. It's not even the HOLIDAY SEASON YET. FUCK.

I spent a total of $123.62 on shopping, $17 on food, $25 on a concert ticket, and FREAKING $16 for parking and toll. Transportation costs are DIVIDED IN HALF with Chrystal. Fucking ridiculous. NOW I understand when public transportation is cheaper than private transportation. When you have to freaking PARK IN SF. What am I to do if I work in SF?! I don't want to ride the bart back during rush hour and there's no way I can drive to work every day. I guess I'll just live in the office until 8pm, when traffic dies down.

I don't like the shoes that I bought today but I CAN'T BELIEVE I FOUND A CUTE BLACK DRESS! HALF OFF at Bebe too! Who would have thought that I would ever buy anything at freaking BEBE? It's not skanky - to be honest I don't remember how it looks but I'm far too tired to try it on right now. I should make sure that my necklaces and shoes all match but whatever - what can I do if they don't? I just remember being surprised that I actually liked the dress at Bebe when I tried it on. It was the second store I looked at too! Looking for shoes at DSW got really desperate so I just went with the first pair I had looked at. Of course, it took me about two hours to decide that. -_-

After shopping, we went to Little Star Pizza and by this point I was FREAKING hungry. OMGGG SO Delicious though. We went to another one, not near Castro but closer to the Civic Center. Apparently it's walking distance to the bart station, so I think I will be eating litte star pizza A LOT MORE OFTEN! Chrystal LOVED it. Once again, I ate half a pizza, but it was a 9" not a 12", so it wasn't nearly as painful as the time I ate half a pizza with Alvin. Added bonus: we found really close, free street parking. AMAZING!

But the parking for concert - NOT AMAZING. Thank goodness there was an $18 maximum. -_- Chrystal and I were freaking out because while paying for drinks at the concert, we realized that we had ended up with only a $1.50 left in our pockets. NOT GOOD. I'm trying not to think about the fact that I spent close to $200 in a day. The dress is forgivable. The shoes and necklace, not so much. I could have saved $10 if we had just taken the Bart instead of driving, but we had assumed lugging around shopping bags to a concert would be too big of a hassle. Other than that, I have no regrets.

The concert was ok - pretty good considering I have never really listened to Minus the Bear, except for when Chrystal would play it in our dorm room. It made me want to go to more concerts. We managed to get a table on the side, which felt a lot nicer than having to stand for three sets.

And, AMAZINGNESS! I totally have a sense of direction in SF now! After walking from the Transbay Terminal to Westfield several times this summer, and then a few times taking the muni, I've kind of gotten a vague idea of where the major streets in SF are. At one point, I was like "I think we go this way" and I was TOTALLY RIGHT, even though I had no map in front of me. Awesome.

I'm so tired. SOOO TIRED. I'm going to sleep now.

Three more weeks of fucking marketing and the worst class of my life will be over. More on this one day, when I'm feeling more hateful.

Yay to a good day. Boo to the fact that tomorrow I will once again be blowing a hole through my wallet. Dinner's alone will be $50. Fuck my life. WHY CAN'T I BE MAGICALLY RICH?

I think I will start working again. If only so I can ease the guilt of the next week (oh god, Black Friday, I dread you and what you shall do to my bank account).

I HATE being a female

ARGH. After much debating I finally relented and said I would go to this club/lounge/restaurant/whatever the heck it is place in SF with my friends on Thursday. I hope they don't kick me out after they start serving drinks. I have to freaking buy an entire outfit just for this night. It's something I've been meaning to do for the past three years, but whenever I go to the mall, I hate looking for clothes like dresses and business suits. Which are things that I actually desperately need. I only remember how crappy my wardrobe is a few days before I REALLY need the clothes.

So I need: either a nice dressy top, skirt, and heels, OR I hope I can find a cute black dress and shoes, because that can probably be used more often. THEN I probably have to find something for a party I'm going to on Saturday too. LKSDJFLDSFJLDSFJDSKLFJSLD I DON'T HAVE THE MONEY FOR THIS. Thursday night alone is probably going to cost me $150, just for the meal and outfit. FUCK MY LIFE.

Luckily for me, I was already planning on going shopping with Chrystal tomorrow. I guess she can help me look for stuff, although I don't think we share the same style. We're supposed to go shopping around noon, and then eat at Little Star Pizza (YUM YUM!) and then go to a concert. Of course, I feel like I just suddenly got fatter, at a CRUCIAL MOMENT TOO.

I also just watched The Biggest Loser and I can't believe Coleen got voted off instead of Vicky. WTF. Sometimes when major upsets happen, the eliminated person takes it very graciously and doesn't say anything spiteful. I feel like if someone voted ME off instead of the BIGGEST BITCH in the house, I would throw a major bitch fit. It would be the sort of event where promos show a clip of me going "WHAT the FUCKING HELL?---" and voice it over with "The most DRAMATIC ELIMINATION YET!"

I always enjoy the ending of The Biggest Loser where they show the contestants as they are now. It's crazy that Coleen was so excited to walk into a Macy's and pick clothes off the rack to wear, something she couldn't do before. I guess it makes me think about the things I take for granted, like having space between my thighs (something Chrystal pointed out to me). But then I still hold out for the day when I can say "Today I walked into Bebe and tried on a skanky top. I can't believe it fit me! But I didn't buy it because I'm not a skanky 40-year old Asian mom"

I am currently in my annual "I don't like my life - I'm not doing anything productive and I just sit around watching tv" mode. In the past two years, I remedied this by working at Equilar. I am kind of ready to go back to work there, but I distinctly remembering telling myself NEVER AGAIN. Also, I should just concentrate on recruiting for next semester. SIGH. I need to do something more meaningful in my life. Like maybe make some friends that are my own age, so I can actually go out drinking with people next year.

I didn't do shit yesterday and my next homework assignment is due December 2nd. Which is kind of cool but I still feel incredibly unproductive. I'm going to finish the paper tonight so my next homework assignment is a presentation on December 4th.

One more week of school!

Again, according to my lame calendar which only counts full weeks and discounts the week before finals. So after the coming week, I'll be spending the next four weeks thinking "WTF WHY AM I IN SCHOOL?"

I wonder what the link is between msn.com and NBC's The Biggest Loser, but I find it suspicious that every week, there is some mention of The Biggest Loser: diet tips and weight loss stories on the site.

For someone who has never been in a relationship and has never really thought about marriage/weddings, (except that I know that if I were amazingly rich, I want FIREWORKS!!!) I would like this song to be played sometime during that day.



I finished my last accounting hw assignment today. I also finished the last case paper for my marketing class, and if I hadn't had the misfortune of picking the LAST week to present, I would have nothing left to worry about for that class, besides the final. I love that time of a semester when homework assignments are dwindling down. I'm so over school. I'm over this apartment and I'm kind of over Berkeley. LET ME LEAVE ALREADY!!!

I didn't get to go shopping this weekend OR go to the protests OR hang out with friends that much. After hearing about Brian's insane naked food orgy party at a co-op, I wonder if I will regret spending all my weekends couped up in my apartment, doing homework for the next week. Just so DURING the week I can waste my time watching tv and browsing sites without feeling guilty. Entertaining the scenario of eating melted chocolate off some stranger's body is fun but I doubt I would ever do it. I think the most disgusting thing I found about Brian's story was that everyone walked around barefoot. Not the random make outs with complete strangers, naked, sweaty dancing, or eating chocolate with HANDS, but EW! NO SHOES?! That's pretty yucky.

After five days of listening to Miley Cyrus, I've found that my favorite songs are:
1. Nobody's Perfect - which is really awesome to listen to as I walk around Berkeley because it does wonders for my self-esteem
2. See You Again (Rock Mafia Remix) - Once you hear the rock mafia remix, you can't go back to the original
3. The first twenty eight seconds of Girls Just Want To Have Fun
4. Simple Song - I think this is the one that sounds most like a normal song that could be played on the radio
5. Rock Star - I ALWAYS picture Miley Cyrus dancing around on stage to this song. I wish I could get the images out of my head. I don't even know where the images came from

I thought of this while showering after swimming, but I'm going to make a mixed CD for Eric and put two Miley Cyrus songs on it and make up a fake artist name. I don't think he reads this blog so he will not find out about this. Then I will ask him what he thinks about the songs. HEHEHE I did it to him with Lindsay Lohan - A Beautiful Life on a previous mixed cd

"Eric, do you like this song?"
"Yeah"
"Do you know who sings this?"
"No, who?"
"Lindsay Lohan"
"OMG WHAT?! NOOOO WHY DID YOU TELL ME THAT"

I suck

I spent most of today discussing my marketing paper with my partner. We got a lot of ideas out, but we have no tangibles to turn in yet. I have to write up the paper by tomorrow night, and complete all of my other homework assignments. I'm pretty disappointed in myself because I had really wanted to go to SF today and participate in the protests. There aren't many issues I have strong feelings about, but gay rights is one of them. I also enjoy the feeling of being in a massive crowd and I wanted to see what kind of creative signs people had made. Instead I sat around in my apartment :( and I guess I went to Caroline's to eat her homemade waffles. I deem myself, LAME.

I used to eat one pita bread per meal, then started eating two. I told myself to go back to eating only one, and somehow, I've ended up eating FOUR A DAY. At this rate, I'm going to be spending ($1.50 x 6) + ($4.00 x 3) = $21 a WEEK in pita bread and hummus alone. That ... is not as cheap as I would like.

Yahoo says that depressed people watch 25 hours of tv a week. Thankfully, I do not watch twenty five hours of tv a week. I watch (HIMYM, Life, Lipstick Jungle, The Office, 30 Rock, Brothers and Sisters, Biggest Loser, Daily Show) 9 hours of tv a week! Is that all? I hope so.

Lipstick Jungle is cancelled! I'm so sad. The writing is so much better than the first season. I think the only good thing is that nothing crazy and ridiculous will happen before it gets cancelled (at least I hope) so it end well. If it had more seasons, I'm sure there would be many more breakups, which would be X__X But they do a very good job writing about their friendships and not always about their relationships, which needs to happen more in shows about women.

I started getting into Chuck too. NOOOO. I like Jordana Brewster a lot, and she has some guest roles in Chuck so instead of doing homework, I decided to watch that instead. Pretty, no?



OMG I should be doing ... HOMEWORK!

New reading material

Eric and Alvin have blogs. But they don't do very much to satisfy my blog reading needs! I sometimes have random moments when I really want to find interesting blogs to read. There are so many people in the world and I wonder how many of them have blogs that I would enjoy reading. It's very hard to find blogs to follow though. And I'm sure the joy of reading some blogs is because you can hear the person's voice in your head, which I never take the time to develop when reading a stranger's blog. :( Maybe I should be trying to find actual friends anyway.

I wish people would blog more often and more personally. This is what my blog would be if it were like others

THE MOST EPIC CREW RACE EVER*



This is a balance sheet I made in accounting class

Blah dippity doop bleep bloh. Bleep bloops leepity loop.

* I did not actually watch this video. I hope you didn't either

An Embarassing Confession

It's kind of sad how eagerly I waited for Danny's three Miley Cyrus cds to finish transferring. Also sad - how I spent several seconds debating whether to change the artist name from Hannah Montana to Miley Cyrus for several songs. But I don't think I would have been able to sit and study microeconomics for so long if I hadn't been singing "NOBODY'S PERFECT I GOTTA WORK IT! AGAIN AND AGAIN TILL I GET IT RIGHT" in my head.

I hate that feeling when you're studying late into the night, and you wonder to yourself why you didn't start studying earlier. I know I have better time management than this. But it seems no matter how stressed I am, I find a reason to constantly check my gmail.

Back home from UCSD

I'm home! AND SO FUCKED! When I booked a ticket for home, I was intending it to be relaxation and a pick-me-up after realizing that I probably will not be getting a 4.0 this semester. Unfortunately, I think this weekend only made my grade situation WORSE. HAHA It was well worth it though :D

Now I dislike Berkeley TONS. I do not like my dark and kind of gross apartment! Why can't I live in a beautiful, modern looking apartment like everyone else? And I do not have TMVers just a few blocks away from me. :( But after this weekend, I wondered what would have happened if I had gone to a socal school as well. It seems like the biggest gatherings are when I come home. Maybe we would never had had big gatherings again if most of us were in socal! Well, it certainly makes the few moments we have together much more memorable and valuable to me.

Going to the SD airport was fun. I love the feeling of friends going to the airport together! There is sadness and happiness all at once. Sadness because I am leaving. But happiness because I have friends who are willing to drive me to the airport, and like me enough to visit them! :D

I was riding the bart back and I saw a terrible sight. The Bart coming from San Francisco to Richmond was PACKED. Disgustingly overfilled, and when it made stops, there were STILL people waiting in line, trying to get on. It looked grossly stuffy and uncomfortable from the Bart train that I was sitting in. It makes me wonder, do I want to take public transportation to work in the future? It was 6pm, so right during rush hour. I can imagine myself staying later at work just so I wouldn't have to go home at the same time as everyone else.

And I was also wondering to myself, if I have to go to the airport in the future, who would take me! If I go on business trips, I hope I have friends who are willing to pick me up and drop me off at the airport. :(

And now I SO BADLY need to do microeconomics studying. AND read the marketing cases. I can't believe how much work I have to do.

HEARTS TO EVERYONE I SAW THIS FABULOUS WEEKEND! I cannot wait to go home for Thanksgiving :):)

Visiting UCSD

It's so bizarre to visit UCSDers in their new apartments. Everyone has moved off campus and since I have absolutely no sense of direction, whenever we drive around I'm hopelessly lost. I can't believe how far everything is. OR how nice EVERY apartment is, and how much parking there is. It's INSANE. SD is kind of a place that I would like to live in when I'm older, but I don't really want to live so close to a college. But I love all the condos!

While I enjoy being the person who "brings together everyone" I can't believe how rarely everyone sees one another! But at the same time, I have yet to actually meet up with Jackie since school started, so I should not be talking. Sometimes when TMV hang out, it feels like nothing has changed at all. But sometimes I hear about things and can't believe how much some of us have changed. I wonder how I have changed since high school. I hope it is for the better.

When we are driving from house to house, it felt as if we all lived in the same city, but not with our parents. As if we had magically decided to all live in the same place after graduating. Everyone's residence is pretty similar to what I would have imagined for them. Danny lives in a very nice apartment that is not very furnished. I would like to live in a place like that - it's two story with a loft! Although I would only need one bedroom in the future and not three. His bathroom is super nice. Today Connie L saw a bag of calcium chews and was like "WTF DANNY WHY DO YOU HAVE THESE? Do you know these are for menopausal women?" and Danny was like "they're GOOD" :D

Connie Y's room is very similar feeling to her Arcadia room, because it is very cozy and cute. We talked there for a long time last night. The boys went downstairs to smoke and I felt like we were with stereotypical Asian gangsters. They were just standing around the street smoking. HAHA

Connie L's/Frances L's place is very similar to how Connie's old place was. Very uniquely decorated. Whenever I come, I always want a cat but I know that I am really a dog person. I mainly hung out with Frances L today, which was fun. ALTHOUGH I was supposed to study SIGH SIGH

What have we done? Hmm... Danny drove me down yesterday. SO FUN I love riding in his car ... or really any car where the driver goes fast and I feel safe enough to not feel like I will die. He sang for most of the ride. My favorite parts of life are when I just look out the window, and I especially love seeing the ocean when driving towards SD. We ate at ... a Korean restaurant yesterday and then went to this crazy dessert place in the gay area of SD. Who knew there was such a place?

Alvin: I bet that biker's gay
Me: Because he's riding off the seat?
Alvin: Yeah and because his jeans were tight

Yesterday was another big gathering day, which was very nice. :)

Today the main gathering we had was going to eat at a Japanese restaurant and then playing mini golf at Boomers. FUN FUN FUN Now we are playing Scattegories and Pictionary. And we STILL HAVE TOMORROW, the REAL veteran's day, to play!

I feel "very blessed" (I just read an interview by Lindsay Lohan, which is why that phrase is floating around my head) to have friends who seem so excited when I come down :) AWW to everyone!

I downloaded more Benji Hughes songs and I am surprised that I like them. None of them sound remotely similar to "Waiting for an Invitation" which I am STILL looking for. But I like one song and I didn't notice until today that some of the lyrics of "You Stood Me Up" go "Hundred million ways to break a heart, that's one you taught me" which is kind of cool I guess

OMFG IT'S 1:41?! I HAVEN'T DONE SHIT TODAY. I think I just blew any possibility of getting A's in my classes

Veteran's Day Weekend

I've reached the second day of "eat as much as you can without feeling guilty" time. After years and years of staring at myself in the mirror before and after meals, I've realized that I can gorge on food for about two days without exercising, but still wake up looking surprisingly normal. But on the THIRD DAY ... that's when things get CRAZY LARGE! Hopefully I'll be able to do something more active later today, when I'm in SAN DIEGO! (although Danny "threatened" to take me to some desserts galore place so maybe I will just continue riding this train to obesity)

This weekend was fun. My skin is all gross because it's very dry in LA though. Weird ass weather. It was grossly hot when Alvin and I were driving down from Berkeley. The nights are pretty cool though. And then it got very windy today. But hmm this weekend was fun! Once again a lot of people came together! Yesterday we were at Eric's at another BIG gathering. The day started off with just me and Eric and Marie Callendar's. I have to tell myself NO MORE VEGETABLE QUICHE and NO MORE SHARING HASH BROWNS with Eric because I don't love them THAT much. Next time I should just get a slice of banana creme pie.

Anyway, after that, we went to get his car washed HAHA which is sadly something we've done together before. I LOVE errands with friends! Frances C came to join us, and the former plan was for me to nap and Eric to go to school, but since Frances was with us, we all went to Pomona instead. It was SO FUN - I'm glad I didn't nap. Got to see how Eric lives. Seems like he socializes quite a bit. Maybe architecture ISN'T SO HARD AFTER ALL. Just kidding. Frances and I just talked while he cut styrofoam. We're pretty sure a guy sitting across from us heard the entire conversation. Oh well. I don't think I have spoken to her for a long time about things so :)

We also ate apples that I had brought from home. Eric's place is NICE. Everything looks great compared to Berkeley living places. Then we were deciding where to eat for dinner and the default is always Ichima. HAHA Soupie for high school, Ichima for college, WHERE will eat AFTER college? While I was calling Owen to ideas, we were like "let's just go to Ichima" but once Owen wanted Ichima I heard Eric and Frances go "ummm never mind..." HAHA Then we got stuck in major traffic, during which we kept trying to think of places to go to. It would keep rebounding back to Ichima, and then towards the end when we were REALLY hungry we were like IN N OUT. But INSTEADDDDD

We COOKED! We picked up Henry and went to 99 ranch to get food. :) We had a $17 grocery bill that fed five people and could have fed about seven. So much leftover meat. HAHA And Eric and Henry were super awesome and bought CREAM PUFFS while Frances and I were stuck talking to a mutual family friend. HAHA SOO embarassing: they were like "do you two have boyfriends?" and we were both like "NO NO no boyfriends" RIGHT when we rounded the corner and there was Eric and Henry sitting and waiting for us with the groceries. HAHA

As anyone would expect, Henry ended up doing most of the cooking. I was ready to pop open Eric's box of Captain Crunch cereal. AHHA Although I DID help shake WATER OFF THE SALAD~ We had chinese sausage (which I really wanted), cabbage, shao long baos, beef rib eye something, and delicious fried tofu. I ate about twice what I should have eaten. Over time, Owen, Danny, Alvin, and Will joined us. I had also wanted Mr. And Mrs. Smith which I had kind of wanted to watch ever since Angelina Jolie mentioned it in an interview. I kind of want to buy it now. HAHA I REALLY REALLY want to buy Wanted. I don't think I'll even wait for it to become $10 or whatever. I want it NOW

Owen was telling us a story and I loved how we had SOOO many tangents. Like making fun of him saying Shia Labeouf. I had to look the spelling up. But then once Danny came in, it would be like THE MOST FAR OFF tangents that made it really hard to bring the story back to Owen. HAHA Danny just left the group and went on Eric's computer and Connie L was like HE DOESNT DO THAT IN SD, prompting us to all whine "DANNY WHY DON'T YOU LIKE US DANNYYYY" :)

Danny bought ice cream for us :) but then as the movie ended people started heading back. I had woken up at 7 to go running, so I was INCREDIBLY tired. Got home at 1 and yay! Today I just sat around at home and ate my mom's cooking. We went to Trader Joe's and I got garlic hummus so she could try it. She always finds it necessary to get some sort of ice cream when she comes home. It is like when I buy desserts with friends because eating sweets with others makes me feel less guilty. HAHA Well I have to pack for SD now. YAY! Although I should start studying for my midterm, I get to see MORE TMVers! :) Veteran's Day weekend is pretty fun

Another Xanga-like entry

"THIS DOESN'T FEEL GOOD"