My Off-Balance Life

I don't know why but my life feels very weird right now. Like, something is not quite right and it kind of bothers me. Usually this happens when I don't have very much work to do. When I have less work to do, I start to stress out because then I think "omg there has to be something that I could be doing right now. But I don't know what it is..." That's probably what is happening now. I wanted to make a chart of my stresses but ... actually I figured out how. Awesome.


I'm not quite sure how Google organizes the categories. I like it because it's colorful but I doubt anyone is going to take a good look at that. Don't bother - I didn't think too carefully about the numbers. Making it actually took a lot out of me, but at least I know how to do something new with google documents :D

I don't even know what to say now. Hmm. There are a lot of things on my mind but I don't know what is most interesting to blog about.

Since I don't have as much work to do anymore (yay!) I'm starting to stress out about other things in life that are much more difficult to take care of. For instance, I don't know why but yesterday I started thinking about how I'm not in very close contact with TMV people anymore. I think I realized this when I was thinking about what I would do for the summer. I was thinking to myself, "I hope TMV people come up to visit me ... but I bet they won't ... but that's ok since my floormates will be here in the summer" and then I was like OH NO! I hope this doesn't mean I'm starting to heart my floormates over TMV now. I hope this isn't the first step towards losing contact with high school friends. =L

I've always been fine with being really far from almost all TMV people and not really knowing what's going on in their lives. Partly because I'm very happy with my college life and partly because I don't think very much happens when I'm gone anyway. HAHA. But after yesterday I was like hmm ... I always figure that I can't dwell on keeping in contact with TMV because life goes on and it's very difficult to make the effort when I can walk two doors over and have fun. But then I was like, but I don't want to make that excuse when I graduate and start working because I would like to say that I will always know what's going on in our group. I don't know.

Then I'm kind of disappointed that I'm going to get a B in econ this semester. I have only 15 units, 2 classes are P/NP meaning that the B is going to make a huge impact on my GPA. I should have entered this semester thinking "this semester is important because I am applying for internships next year," not "I figure I got into Haas so this semester, I will relax." You might think this is just evidence of my never being satisfied, but actually, I only really have to worry about my GPA for one year, if my plan goes well. I have to work really hard this summer and the fall semester, apply for internships, and hopefully get one. Then, if I get an internship and do well at it, it's my experience that matters, not my GPA. I'm just waiting for that moment where experience trumps GPA and getting 4.0s is no longer my concern.

After Boat Dance I didn't gym and ate pretty unhealthily. =L I hope I can change this starting tomorrow. My body is really weak now, I think I have to start actually getting out of breath on the elliptical. It's very hard to push yourself on the elliptical but it's much easier on the treadmill. I never swim now and I never took any of those exercise classes like aerobic kickboxing.

There are signs posted about moving out. Eek! I'm super excited for next year. I'm just really stressed because my mom doesn't know I'm ROOMING with a boy. She only knows I'm living with them ... Let's hope she never visits me. It's like a disowning just waiting to happen. Anyway, how exciting. I paid $500 for a security deposit last week and it felt super weird. It was $500 out of my bank account and I didn't tell my mom beforehand ... it felt very adult. Turned in contracts and everything. I'm also excited to see where my friends are living.

Plans:
- BBQ at Caroline's since she has a backyard
- Football games
- Random people coming over to my place because I'm closest to campus
- My pretending that I'm not at home when people I don't like call
- Dinner parties

Ok. Wow, it's 12:15. I was ready to sleep at 11:30 Whoopsie dooo

boat dance

ok i'm suppperr tired right now. insanely tired. but i like to blog about things right after they happen, because then you kind of feel the excitement as you write it and it's less of a xanga feel that's like "yesterday i did this and this and this." so i am going to suffer for about twenty minutes and then turn off my computer and go to bed at 3 am.

today was the BOATT DANCEEE. i put up such a fuss about not wanting to go. but then my floormates made me. and i found myself actually excited to go. it's like a prom redux - we have charter buses that take us from our dorms to the embarcadero. from the pier we get on a cruise ship - 3 levels of djs, nonalcoholic drinks, and desserts. busride - fun. embarcadero - fantastically gorgeous and we go there at exactly sunset which was perfectly timed. cruise ship - perfectly sized with everything you need.


to be honest, i was like "whoa ... i think i'm having more fun now than i had at prom." prom was good - but definitely it was because of the friends i went with. tmv makes anything fun. tmv makes car washing fun (and that's been proven). but this was like ... nonstop dancing from 8-12 which i would have never imagined myself doing except that i was in a group where EVERYONCE danced and no one would want to sit down. plus the group itself was fun. so, WIN WIN. i thought the djs were pretty good - i wish i could find ALL the songs that were played and dl them. have to get: that really annoying danity kane song, some song that's about ghostriding, but it's not the e-40 one. so many others that i'll never remember.

we also had the cha cha shuffle? or something which was pretty cool and i had never seen it before. but EVERYONE knew what was going on so i was like "WHOA what have i been missing out on?" i also love how certain songs have designated dancing moves. like for flo-rida, the ENTIRE DANCE FLOOR does the get low part, and i wish someone could film it. and kelly clarkson - since you've been gone seems to be the staple last dance song everyone jumps to.

eek my feet hurt so much. i didn't even wear heels for that long. honestly, by the time we got onto the bus i wanted to take my shoes off. thankfully michelle had told me to bring rainbows, which i actually didn't use at all on the ship (because i just went barefoot) but it came really in handy when we went directly to late night after.

so dancing - fun. i wish had really good moves. oh well. pictures taken on the ship are amazing because one side was the sf financial district and the other was the bay bridge. god, i love bay area. anyway, four hours passed by insanely quickly. my calves hurt now but before it was the ball of my foot. not much to say about the cruise ship part - we danced, we had fun, we got separated at some point but we somehow ALL found each other and became an even bigger group than we started out with. we got back on buses around 12:30 and i pretty much fell asleep the second we hit bay bridge. when i woke up we were four blocks from home and i was like WHOAAAA.

sad yet funny to me: three people brought cameras. two of them lost power before the bus even got to sf. mine lasted the whole night and still has power. so YEAH. but boo i never got an ENTIRE group picture. i think each time we managed to get big group pictures, it was only half of the people. :( it's so hard to get big group pics. we never really got one for prom. we never got one for graduation OR grad night. BOO. oh wellllll

anyway - we get back to the dorm; i had suggested going to late night but most people were like "nooo i'm tired." but when i get off the bus paulo's like YEAH LET'S GO so we end up going with like five other people. LONGEsT LINE EVERRR but SUCH GOOD FOOD (i was really hungry). delicious omelet plate, as i always get. we come back, i immediately shower, and here i am.

so yay! i can't believe it's a thursday night. i was like "GUYS WE SHOULD EAT BRUNCH TOMORROW ... wait ... is it friday tomorrow?" and before we left christine was like "nooo after today we have nothing to look forward to, it'll just be finals" and i was like "yeah sure whatever" but now i'm like OMGGG THATS SO TRUE. i'm seriously sad now. time to get ready for finals. SADNESS. i don't want to stop living with my floormates. i don't want my friends to graduate! one of them is going to ucla med school and i'm like omggg :( your real life is beginning. :( must savor these last few days.

but yeah. i heart my friends. both the ones here and the ones back home. :)

Being terribly lazy

I'm using wireless right now. Berkeley has wireless internet all over campus where you just login with your id and password and you have internet! I use it all the time when I take my laptop to the study lounge and ... "study." But right now I'm sitting in my room, the ethernet cable is literally a foot from me, but I really don't feel like reaching over and picking it up. So ... wireless it is!

Anyhoo, I actually feel very tired right now but I shouldn't take a nap. I have an interview soon for another ASUC position. I'm debating between contacts or glasses. I don't look good with my glasses but if I wear contacts, I risk having a sudden attack of dry eyes and going into the interview constantly looking like >___o o____< >____o

I had a weird dream yesterday. I don't even really remember it and it's really not that interesting to read about but I'll write about it anyway. I was sitting and eating at some cafe-like restaurant that seemed to be in an alley. I was eating with two friends from Berkeley - when I woke up I really could not figure out who the two people were. We were talking about some song and I was like "my friend Eric really likes that song" and they were like "HAHA I bet it's because of THIS LYRIC" and they point out some part of a song that Eric really would like - it's like that female, very natural sounding and sweet voice with some strumming of the guitar. And then we all laughed about it. The end. I woke up feeling like AW I miss TMV because it's cute that we know random little things about each other. Makes me almost not want to stay in Berkeley for the summer.

Today should be a busy day and then it'll all wind down. I can count on two hands how many homework assignments I have left to do
- 4 physics and music homework assignments that usually take about 15 minutes to do, each
- 1 Fun in Science poster that's basically me pasting pictures to a posterboard
- 1 Film paper due Friday that I will attempt to finish by tomorrow night
- 2 film papers that take me about 20 minutes to do, each
- 1 IEOR reflections paper that takes me about 15 minutes to do
- 1 IEOR project that involves powerpoint presentations, meaning practice time and slide making. But still relatively stressfree because all the groundwork has been done
- 2 Econ homeworks that are the scourge of this semester

Fine. If you count individually, that's 12. But I'm counting the number of dashes. Of which there are seven.

My hands smell all fishy because I ate smoked salmon with a bagel today. DELICIOUS. But I wonder who woke up one day and said "I'm going to put some fish on my delicious breakfast food." Also, my bagel yesterday had spots of mold but this one did not. At least, none that I could see under my dim table light.

I found a place to live over the summer! I will be subleting for some girl's fraternity room. Sigma nu. I don't know anything about them - I looked it up on wikipedia and I think it's some service fraternity. It's only $400 a month which is damn cheap (hopefully it is not damn shitty). I will be rooming with some girl from the University of Bordeaux, so I take it to mean I'll be rooming with a French exchange student? Sounds cool. I figure if it turns out to be a rather quiet fraternity house, fine. And if it turns out to be a loud, party house, fine because it's only the summer and it'll be like experiencing a fraternity house without having to pledge for one. I'll be working nearly full time for the first half of summer and then work/school the second half. I also want to get up to gym, and then go to the media resources center and watch a movie every day. Plus, I kind of want to visit my norcal floormates every weekend, so I probably won't spend too much time in there anyway. So, this summer will hopefully not be as "sit around the house all day and wait for friends to wake up so we can go out" as it was last summer.

Now I must go otherwise I'll actually be late to my interview.

OMFG THREE DAYS TILL BOAT DANCE. SHOOT. I ate like 1/3 of my granola box yesterday and felt terrible.

A happy post

Dude I am freaking tired. Super really effing tired. But my day was AWEEESOMEEE. I use that word a lot, I've realized. I did a shitload today. And besides the meeting I had in the morning, I didn't even touch homework and I barely thought about it. The downside is that I REALLY want to do homework this weekend, because if I can finish it all, I basically don't have to do very much for the next three (THREE!!!) weeks of school. Which means I probably won't go out tomorrow when I was SUPPOSED to go eat at la note's and schubert's and shop in sf.

Anyway. Today:
1) Gymmed. Yay! Except my body is so weak now. I can't even believe I used to be able to run on the track in the summer. Really need to get in shape!
2) IEOR meeting where we fleshed out basically our entire final project and once we actually start making the slides, we're just two presentations away from FINISHING THIS DAMN PROJECT! WHEEEE Plus Amy made muffins which were DELICIOUS. Everytime I go to her apartment, I'm like DAMN I so want to live here. I'm pretty sure it's that feeling a lot of people get when they walk into a house and they're like "this is it. This is the house!" And it's PROBABLE that I WILL live there so EEEEEEEKKKK I am excited!
3) Chinatown! San Francisco one, not the Oakland one. It was nice to see it but I wouldn't go again. MMMMMM the bakeries SO GOOD. It was a total cockfest though - six guys and me, a girl. We witnessed a verbal fight on the Bart. Two black guys going at it - I was really amazed by how many insults they could throw at each other. The conductor refused to start the bart and actually came out to scold them. I had to try really hard not to laugh. At the same time, I was thinking to myself "oh please don't pull out a gun." HAHA. We also went into the mall and Virgin megastore but we didn't buy much. OH. We also went to Pier 39 and even though the meal I got was only $7, which is fairly cheap in such a touristy area, I wish I had just eaten back home.

BUTTT I hope this trip taught me a lesson. I had kind of planned the event for just people from our floor to go. But somehow, these guys from the second floor got invited and I was kind of like "what the hell ... why are these random people going?" It turned out that the two guys are pretty cool (one I had met, didn't really like at first, but now I like him a little more; the other I think is SOOO smart and independent) and they were the only people who knew how to get around or where to go. So I was like dangg I'm so glad they went, otherwise I don't know what we would have done. SO hopefully I will learn to be more inclusive of people. I'm very exclusive. It is the TMV culture.

4) Paulo brought back a HUGE carton of his mom's spaghetti for me. I wasn't even hungry but when he showed it to me I was like OMGGG I HAVE TO EAT IT and I ate the entire thing. SO GOOD. Ground beef can NEVER go wrong. Omg. I was like "PAULO YOU ARE THE NICEST" and he was like "seriously? That's what you base niceness on?" AND YEAH. When a guy goes home and remembers to come back with a carton of pasta for you THAT'S SUPER NICE. Totally made my day. EXCEPT MY DAY WAS NOT OVER YET.

5) Met Caroline's mom which was hilarious because I always thought Caroline was kind of like Connie L in the "I <3 my mom!" way. But she was totally like "ok that's enough mom let's go" so HILARIOUS. HAHA. And of course I'm the total parent asskisser so I love meeting parents

6) WATCHED FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL. I was SOOO excited. SO HAPPY to watch this opening weekend. I was like "guys we have to watch forgetting sarah marshall" and caroline was like "we can! I have my mom's car" and I literally leapt out of my chair and starting jumping up and down. So we drove to Emeryville to an ACTUAL THEATER and not the ghetto ones on Shattuck. Driving was not without its difficulties. I love how we were just going down the street and then Caroline goes "uh.... this is a freeway. I am now driving on a freeway..." and then Paulo started giving directions and I was like "do you know where we're going?" "no, I'm just following my instincts." HAHA

Anyway, pretty good movie. Considering my expectations were so high, I'm glad I came out thinking it wasn't a waste of money. BUT part of it is because there were SO MANY PEOPLE I LOVE IN THAT MOVIE. The guy from 30 rock, Billy Baldwin, Jason Bateman, Jason Segel, and obviously KRISTEN BELL. EEKKKKK! So much penis in that movie though.

7) Driving back, dropping the guys off, intending to find parking with Caroline, and then ending up just driving for an hour up and down bay area highways. AWESOME. We blasted music and it was the perfect match because she loves to drive and I love to stare out the windows. So fun.

I also realized this in the car but I HEART CAROLINE. She is totally like, the person who made me realize a lot of things I think are not that bizarre. She's definitely not my twin, but we have common views such as:
a) We get super super sad if we aren't able to gym
b) We have both considered throwing up after eating a huge meal, but knew we couldn't really do it
c) FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS! WHO watches friday night lights?! WE DO.
Ok. I can't think of any more. FINE.

8) Conversation with Jon in the bathroom. HAHA It's a secret conversation though, so I can't say what was said. But it made me very happy. OK

AND NOW IT's 2:40. OMGGG SO MUCH HOMEWORK TO DO. BUT WHATEVERS.

OH ALSO

9) I e-mailed someone about a sublet for the summer and it is only $400 A MONTH. That's incredibly cheap. So I guess I will just stay the entire summer. I don't know what to do with all my stuff though; there's definitely not enough space in the place but I don't know if I can put it in the apartment that I don't even completely own yet, or if I should just take it home. Luckily, my parents are coming up and I also don't have much stuff anyway. Seriously, TV is soon obsolete. All I need is the internet.

10) EGG CUSTARD. I just had one. OMGGG SOOO GOOD. I took nearly the last ones from the Chinatown Bakery. Also hilarious, apparently this was a conversation once:
Jason: Have you ever had egg custard?
Caroline: Yeah! Once in China, I had one in KFC
Jason: KFC?!

OK. I also came up with a new thing to add to my summer to do list. Go on roadtrips with my norcal floormates! We're going to explore randomass cities like Danville and San Ramon and Rockridge and Walnut Creek so I can figure out where I want to live after I graduate. Also, just so we can get to know the area. AWESOMENESS RIGHT? EEK! This summer is going to be AWEEEESSOSMMMMEMEEEE

ALSO, Caroline is pretty close to getting her apartment, which is pretty far but it has a BACKYARD so we were like OK BBQ NEXT YEAR. Also, I was like OMG we all have to come to my apartment because it is freaking close and everyone was like "yeah ... we already figured we'd do that" which AHHAHA CUTE because YAY that means they actually like me enough to spend time with me. HAHA I've already made little like costco lasagna dinner party ideas in my head. I make so many plans nowadays. Like, we're going to go to the football games together next year which FINALLY I have good friends to go with! And then I'm still pushing for us to all take a class together, but that's super hard to coordinate. OMG I JUST REALIZED IF JON LIVES WITH ME HE HAS A WII OMGGGZZZZZ. He's also my scrabble buddy. AWESOME AWESOME. College is not long enough for fun stuff, seriously. It's too long for academics though.

FOUR DAYS UNTIL BOAT DANCE TIME TO STARVE!

My new love

I really should be sleeping. I'm really tired and sometimes I feel like my brain is dying. I really should sleep. But I feel like I rarely blog now and don't you all want to know about my life?! Or has everyone forgotten I exist? HAHA. Anyway...

There's about three weeks left of learning, and about 5 weeks until the last final. Which means only FIVE WEEKS TO FIND a place to LIVE. Every day in class, I think about how I want to furnish my apartment. The apartment in my mind is the one I really really want to get and I will probably get, barring any complications. But all of that will be another entry, because I'd just be rambling in my state.

But my new love ...

CRAIGSLIST. and not JUST craiglist but specifically, FREE STUFF from craiglist! Check it:

I just refresh this every time I open my web browser and it's all the free stuff people want to give away. My god, I wish I had the truck/storage space for this. In particular, the ad that has gotten me all excited is this one.


LOOK AT THE TABLE! It looks so new! I bet it's from IKEA. THE BOOKCASE! I really want that bookcase for my future apartment! And external hard drives?!?! I need an external hard drive!

Things for my new apartment that I would like to get free:

- A desk
- A wheelie chair (otherwise I will buy an exercise ball)
- A dresser
- A night table
- A futon and its frame
- A coffee table
- A bookcase

The sun is gone! Yay

Before you start reading, pause whatever music you have and just hit play here. Don't watch it though, there's no one pretty.



Yay! According to msn, I will have the #4 best job to have after college. The #1 is consulting, which I might do after a few years of accounting/auditing, since I hear that is what most people do. I just need to go through two years of school :(

I am torn between really wanting school to end and not wanting it to end. I thought we had four weeks of school two weeks ago, but starting THIS monday, we have four weeks of school. So in my mind, school's like twice as long now. I really hate economics, especially now that I don't get it all. I guess econ1 knowledge only takes you up to the 11th week of UGBA101b. I kind of wish I had gone to my GSI office hours, but I still don't know when they are and I don't care anymore now. I just want school to be over now so I can get my B in the class and move on. I don't feel like doing work for any of my other classes, but they are all very fun classes so it's not that painful.

On the other hand, I don't ever want the year to end. I can't believe we ONLY have FOUR weeks of school left because OMG I freaking love living with my floormates. Part of me is like "we should live with all of our friends FOREVER. Just buy a giant apartment complex!" There's still so much to do - we've had plans to go to all these different places around the Bay Area for the past three months but every day, we end up hanging out in room 306 and the study lounge and it's enough for us. And unlike high school with TMV when we went out to eat a lot, most of what we do is sitting around in someone's room so I never bring out my camera and there are not that many pictures of us. I will probably take like 500 pics when we go to Boat Dance (yay!) which is a semi-formal dance for people who live in residence halls, and it's on a ship out in the SF Bay. Should be AWWWWEEESOMEEE. And you know me, I really hate dances. I'm so happy that my floormates kept pushing me to go - I probably wouldn't have gone if Caroline didn't decide to go, but I heart my floormates for immediately saying "OK NOW YOU HAVE TO GO" instead of being like "whatever we don't care if Melissa goes." :D

And then I have RCSA friends, two of whom are like some of my closest friends and they are GRADUATING. :( My life would have been very different if I had not met Li-Ting in the beginning of freshman year, and if I had not went to the SF trip and waited at the bus stop with Angelica.

Boo the wonderful overcastness of the morning is leaving. But it's supposed to be less warm today, so yay.

Anyway, what did I even want to write about? I got distracted with nail clipping. I feel like I just have all these blogs that are like "OMG THESE PEOPLE ARE GREAT" but they don't actually have any memories in them. I guess if I'm not going to write memories, I'll just write plans.

What I want to do in the summer:
I still need to finalize my apartment and call that landlord X__X Judging by how most of my life has turned out, I'll get the apartment and realize that I've been stressing out for nothing. I still need a third roomie and I'm trying to take Jon from our floor, although it'll be stealing him from his current roommates. HEHE time to work some charm. I feel like an employer trying to steal someone from a rival company. I totally have all these visions for the summer which in my mind, will be AWEESOMEEEE.

So I get the apartment, but the landlord has said he wanted to do revonations, so I will maybe live in Alvin's place since that is the most convenient. I will work all day, make tons of money, and then every other day, go the Media Resources Center and just watch a new movie every day. Seriously, that place is fun-fucking-tastic. I realize that was not even a word. But it's two floors below the ground level of Moffitt, and it's what looks like 10 HUGE bookshelves filled from top to bottom with dvds. The DVD collection is in that link. You "borrow" one and watch it in the room adjoined to it, which is like tons and tons of booths with its own dvd player and television with headphones.

Besides that, I'm going to spend the summer getting really fit - swim, run, and exercise classes EVERY day. I swear it.

Then I'll visit my Norcal floormates on the weekends. Who lives in Nor Cal: Eric, Christine, Jon, Paulo, Joe. I really really want TMV to visit me, hopefully after I move into my actual apartment. I'd also need to start buying furniture/appliances for the apartment (EXCITING! EXPENSIVE!) and it would be like a week of feasting/fun having. Then I have summer school, where I will hopefully make lots of new Haas friends.

I'm looking forward to this summer. :)

Cal Day

Cal Day 2006: I don't remember it at all. I don't think I really went to anything; I went to the Chancellor's reception at 8:30 in the morning and was thoroughly impressed with how large Haas Pavillion is. The rest of the day is a complete mystery; I only remember walking to Haas with my parents and taking pictures. And again, the only reason I remember it is because we took pictures.

Cal Day 2007: I sat in my room for a large part of the day because I was getting ready for the astro final. It was an overcast day, a fact I only remember because my floormates brought it up. I was very removed from it, and I wouldn't have even known that it was going on.

Cal Day 2008: omg. I have sacrificed my skin for RCSA. I am so much darker now; all because of 2pm-4pm. >:O The shade left but I was like AGHHH I MUST SELL THESE MUGS so I stood there anyway. But I think being a student during Cal Day is more fun than being a prospective freshman on Cal Day. When you're a student, you go around Cal Day because you have friends (otherwise you'd stay in your room, see above). You know what most of the organizations are, you have no shame in going around just getting free stuff, you can pick up all of the rally songs. You can also use your mealpoints and buy whatever you want without thinking about money. When you're tired, you walk back to the dorm and just hang out with you friends more. But being a prospective freshman, you're basically left with your parents, no one knows where anything is, there's too much going on, and it's exciting and a good experience, but not super duper fun.

Well today, I woke up at 7:15. I hosted a person who was really cool; I had actually spoken to her at interviews and remembered her very well so I think that's why she wanted to be my hostee. Then I had to get stuff moved to Sproul at 8am. And every hour after that, I was expecting it to be really late, only to find out that only 20 minutes had passed. But Cal Day was still super fun. I finally sold those god damn bear bottoms that have been in my room forever. I sold about 24 mugs, and now I only have one box of them left (YES!). I think the RCSA account is going to be pretty high now, so I am super happy. Once I order graduation stoles, set up a time for people to pick up their stuff last-minute, then I am DONE DONE DONE with RCSA for this semester! YAYYYY

I came home, immediately took a shower because that was probably the worst I've ever smelled in my life. I spent about 15 minutes counting the money - I have in my possession $1570 in PURE CASH which is INSANE. I could buy a car with that money. Anyway, then I watched some HIMYM with Caroline (YESSS we have gotten past the duller episodes of season 1. It's always really painful for me to watch them because I tell everyone "THIS IS THE BEST SHOW EVERRRR" and when they watch the first ten episodes I'm always like "it gets better I swear"). Then I ate dinner with some floormates (Sushi House, which I now no longer like. I seriously think nothing can compare to Ichima, and it's like the measuring stick for all sushi places now, and so far, every place has FAILED). Watched more HIMYM - I believe we might have watched a total of twelve episodes. HAHA. I did not go to a party so I could watch HIMYM. Terrible. But my excuse was that I was too fat to go out wearing what I wanted to wear.

So I'm happy for now. Except for the fact that Berkeley IS INSANELY HOT RIGHT NOW. OMFG. I hate it when the sun comes out. There's no smog layer like there is in LA, so the sun is particularly direct and painful. SOOO HOT. I don't know how to turn off the heater to this room so it's even worse. Also, I have not done any work in a very long time, and I am torn between giving up on Econ, coasting, and getting a B, or working very hard and trying to get an A- and not feel terrible about myself. Who knows.

Tomorrow marks the beginning of: working a lot of hours every week, super dieting to get ready for Boat Dance, getting all my hw done early, anddd I don't even know. Ok.

I don't blog very much. I don't even remember what I used to blog about. Hmm.

Trader Joe's organic strawberry fruit spread is very good. My new food obsession is peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and also a "sandwich" consisting of one slice of bread, a slice of muenster cheese, and a slice of turkey breast, eaten like a giant cheese/cracker.

.5(20) Reasons my life is a little sad

1. I'm pretty sure I once brought a pair of scissors to high school for the sole purpose of cutting my split ends during yearbook

2. I own two notebooks where I wrote down everything I ate from 3/22-8/19 and then 8/20-11/27. Apparently on my birthday of 2007 I had: cereal, banana, clif bar, salmon, salad, bread. I also went on the elliptical for 30 minutes and did the rowing machine for 10 minutes. On Frances Lo's birthday I apparently had blueberry bread, green tea ice yogurt, zucchini date bread (these are all from Trader Joe's, I can tell), a chicken skewer, grapes, and salad. I have no idea where I got a chicken skewer from. I apparently went on the treadmill for 35 minutes and ran 2.5 miles and did the rowing machine for 10 minutes.

3. I've never kissed anyone

4. I felt tired while running to the bus stop with two Trader Joe's grocery bags. I spent about 30 seconds sitting on the bus trying not to make it obvious that I was catching my breath

5. When I'm interviewed and they ask "tell me about yourself," I really have nothing else to say besides "I'm a second-year at UC Berkeley and I'm a business major. I like to watch tv and go to the gym."

6. I probably read 1/6 of the books that I check out from the library

7. There have been several days when I ate yogurt parfaits for all three meals. One from Bear Market for breakfast, one I made myself for lunch, and one from GBC for dinner.

8. I got more homework done in one sitting yesterday while watching the wushu competition with Danny at Haas Pavillion than I have for the past three weeks.

9. My idea of getting ready to go out is deciding whether or not to tie my hair, and then putting lotion on my face and hands.

10. I have to put eyedrops in my eyes at least five times a day, and that's when I'm not wearing contacts.

I can't think of that many sad things so I will multiply this by .5 so I can still use the label 20 things. I guess it's a good thing that I don't have many sad things. I'm actually not sad by the way! I'm very content with life.

Things I love

There's a lot on my mind and at first I was like "I bet this is a lot of stress because of school" but honestly I think I'm just faking myself out because when I look at the list of everything I have to do, most if it can't be done just yet. So like today, I kept thinking OMG I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO and I felt very guilty for speaking to my floormates for two hours after I got home. But when I went to my room I was like ... ok work time ... but there's nothing to do that's assigned tomorrow.

So I figured out why my mind is just racing. Because I'm ACTUALLY very happy but I'm mistaking it for stress. And I'm stressing out because I need to make a LIST and I just keep making lists of things to do, when that's not the right list I should be making! Does that make sense? I think so.

So list time: things I love

- My floormates and how I can just knock on the door and go in and talk to them for hours and hours about the randomest things. And how I feel like I've known them for so long even though I started talking to them in mid-December and it was only for two weeks before we went on winter break and when we came back we all loved each other. Seriously, how is it that living with people makes you so much closer? I wonder if I would have been friends with them if I hadn't lived with them. Probably not because we aren't that similar and I would have been too shy to talk to some of them.

- TMV obviously and I still can't believe that I can go to school and rarely talk to most of them but come back for spring break and know that I can go out and hang out with them within a few hours of landing in Arcadia. And how despite being with each other for hours and hours when we are home, we still have amazingly a lot to talk about and relatively very little drama and I really think we will all be lifelong friends and I will be very sad when we graduate because we won't be coming home as often.

- TMV's taste in music because when I'm at school I don't know what is going on in popular radio at all, but when I come home, Danny and Will seem to always know what's up with the current music trends and I come back to Berkeley and update my iPod. Damn you Kanye West, you are oddly fun to listen to.

- Overcast weather in Berkeley! It's ridiculously cold sometimes but YES! I can wear long sleeve sweaters for a little while longer and I can start working out hardcore so when summer sun really does roll around, I won't have a muffintop.

- RCSA and having the opportunity to talk to prospective freshmen about the school. I can't believe how much more social I have become in regards to speaking to strangers. I remember a lot of adults in high school would say "I used to be very shy but after college I came out of my shell" and I was afraid it wouldn't happen to me, but I think it did. So yay! I just need to be even MORE outgoing and make the first move to people in class, which I am sometimes still apprenhensive about

- RCSA friends and how I somehow became very close to a few people and I still have no idea how. I was like a little freshmen and all my close RCSA friends are older. I wish I had made a very close freshman friend through RCSA so it would have been like reciprocating but it hasn't happened just yet. Maybe next year.

- Getting into Haas and feeling a lot more secure about my future. At the same time, I'm kind of freaking out sometimes because it's a little scary to realize just how planned out my life really was. I mean, I said last year that if I were to get into Haas I wouldn't be coming home for summer ever again and now that I'm in Haas ... I can't believe I'm actually on that road. It's like, getting into college was just a step onto a road that led to many, many roads. But getting into Haas is like getting onto that final road. Ok, that sounds very inflexible - I do plan to do something besides work for a Big4. But ... wow. I can map out my entire life for possibly the next decade. It's summer school/work this summer, Haas classes, find internship for next summer, more Haas classes, graduate, do something fun for the summer like travel or learn how to surf or if all else fails, just work more. Then ... work. Real actual income and not hourly wages work.

- Did I mention how much I love my floormates?

- How I Met Your Mother episodes and the genius that is Carter Bays and Craig Thomas. I think this is seriously my all-time favorite show, which is what I used to call Buffy, but Buffy had a lot of weak episodes (forgiven because of its 7-year run and 1-hr long episodes) whereas I feel like so many of HIMYM episodes are FLAWLESS. Seriously, www.tedmosbyisajerk.com, the Slap Bet and The Pineapple Incident episodes are some of the greatest things ever. The continuity in this show is mindblowing. And the cliffhangers! I wish this show could go on forever. But that we can find out who the mother is in two-three seasons and after that it's seeing their relationship. Because, AWESOME. I've listened to the song Ted Mosby Is A Jerk 3times through already, and when you can listen to a 20minute song 3 times through in a single day, I think that shows how much you love something.

- Direct Deposits and working. Wow, I'm so happy to finally get paychecks again. I don't ever want to stop working. It's so awesome that I spent about $150 in a week for spring break, but THAT'S OK because today I looked at my bank account and I have $134 added in! Direct Deposit is magic. I don't even know how to deposit checks in person.

- Asking Steven to room with me and now I feel like he really is the person I would want to room with most. I love my floormates and I think we're good floormates but when I think about it, maybe we wouldn't have made great apartment mates. But Steven is so nice! I've noticed that when I need to make a decision, the best decision is usually the first thing I want to do, but because I'm me, I always try to find other options and go into too much trouble, just to find out that my first option was best. But it makes that final decision a lot more satisfying

- Having use of my knees. I don't know why, but everytime I exercise now, I think to myself "one day you'll be too old to do this!"