If my life were a TV show...

This song would play when I break up with someone that I still liked

The illiterate college student

Agh! I kind of had plans to just sit around the house and read all day for this week that I'm at home. I've really liked being at home and keeping to myself. It's a very abrupt change from the days when I talked to people for several hours straight at the dorms. After my floormates left, I had dinner with my mom on Tuesday at Ichima. I've decided that I will only order one sushi roll if I go out for sushi, because two is way too filling. Wednesday, I ate with my aunt, uncle, and mom at a Thai restaurant. Today I'm eating with my RA who happens to be in San Gabriel ... Friday is Erica day, and then hopefully people will be able to do things on Saturday. I realize that I just wrote out all of this after saying "I've liked keeping to myself," but half of it is family, and I don't really count that as going out.

Point of blog: Agh! I can't read anymore. I went to the library, got two books, and returned them the next day. I'm really picky about books now. For fiction, I can't stand all that chick lit stuff I used to read. And then I don't like it when the author is clearly writing about him/herself, just through a made up name. And then I can't stay awake for the "good" writing, where it's all beautifully written descriptions of things or thoughts that just put me to sleep. All that's really left are books similar to those on Oprah's booklist - decently well-written, but for the common person who can only read so many words in a sentence.

For nonfiction, I realized that the only things I enjoy reading about is health, food or biographies on chefs. I like to read about neurology or psychology but I generally can't find books that are interesting and written in laymen terms. I'd also like to pick up a book on politics or world issues, but once I actually look inside, I already know that I shouldn't even bother checking it out. To be honest, I don't really care and I know so little that all the material is very hard to get through and I'd end up wikipediaing every other term.

So, I'm currently reading the Beekeeper's Apprentice, which is pretty interesting. I got it once at the Berkeley library but I delayed and ended up having to return it. Well I found it at Arcadia library, and it looked relatively clean so I got it. But every time I pick it up, or any other book, my mind just starts thinking about a ton of other things. Every time the character does something, I think to myself "hey! I want to do this! I should write this down in my list of to dos" or it'll remind me about something I want to blog about, or it'll make me think about my life. A good book should make you reflect, but I reflect while reading, and I end up just trying to speed read so I can get on with my life. If anything, reading just stresses me out because it reminds me of all the things I wish I knew about or all the things I wish I could do.

Ex.
Character in book meets Sherlock Holmes
Me: Wow she befriends Sherlock Holmes. I kind of want to meet someone that intelligent. I'm just sitting in this house all day. Maybe I should be going out and trying to talk to strangers. But I'm not as intelligent Mary is. Maybe I should try to become smarter. I should try reading more. Which is why I'm reading this. But I should probably read some sort of nonfiction book, which would teach me more. Or I should read some articles on The Economist. I'm kind of hungry. No! Must continue reading. I just thought of a song I want to download though. And I kind of want to blog. Eyes ... closing. Nap time.

I kind of think studying hard in high school messed up my love for reading. My reading level peaked at Animorphs, and after all those AP books, I just read blogs and gossip articles. Which is probably why I write the way that I do. I figure that I really don't need to know very much about the world. Interviews for auditors are mainly behavioral questions, like "describe a time you had to work with someone who didn't do things the way you liked," and answering questions like that requires going outside and doing things, not reading. If I were going into finance, I'd be completely fucked, but thankfully, I'm not. And I make enough friends by talking about TV anyway, and that's conversation that interests me, not things like what stances politicians are taking or who won the last debate.

So instead of reading this past week and learning a little bit, I've just woken up at 8:30 every morning (eeK! I just realized that this is an hour later than I did at school - must wake up earlier tomorrow!) just to turn on my computer and spend about 3-4 hours downloading music. I don't think I could do this another day though, and good thing because tomorrow is Friday. But every time I want to do something, I just check facebook, then gmail, then lie around. At least I only have a few days left of this, before I start work.

So that's that. I'm going to write in my electronic diary now, before Yu picks me up. This was not a "oh woe is me" entry, but it was more of "hey I have this thought that I want to put down because if I don't, my mind will explode from too many thoughts."

Songs I've really liked:
Estelle ft. Kanye West - American Boy (thanks to Owen, who doesn't read this which is why I will say: I'm not sure exactly why, but after he came to my house to drink with my floormates, I really started to like Owen more. He's probably the person I know the least in TMV, but for some reason, I've realized that even Owen loves TMV and is a better guy than a lot of guys in the world)


Jonathan Clay - Back to Good
You can always count on a sappy scene from The Hills to have a really good mellow song

Panic at the Disco - Nine in the Afternoon
What! It's a good song to run to, and sing to in an empty house

Baumer - Take What's Mine

Test Your Reflex - Thinking of You

Kanye West

AH NO! I'm starting to like Kanye West. NOOO I used to think his music was super annoying. I hate the way he sometimes draws out the word and it's NOT MUSIC. But then Will's ringtone is Flashing Lights and that "flashing flashing lights lights lights" part is so annoying that it becomes catchy. AND SO FUN TO SING WITH PEOPLE. Damn

And in all of spring break I've only gone running TWICE. AGH. I don't understand why gyms can't have lower daily rates. The one here charges $15/day I think, and the RSF charges $10/day. NO ONE PAYS THAT MUCH TO GO TO THE GYM FOR AN HOUR. I would totally do it for $5 a day. And for $5/day, it would still be $150/month, which is still ridiculously more than their monthly charges. SO OBVIOUSLY IT'S STILL A WIN WIN TO CHARGE $5 -_______-

Ok, end of spring break is like, the mark for a school year. AH! I really have to solidify my housing for the summer, figure out what classes I want to take, finish up club stuff, and GET MY GRADES UP AH. I have a solid B in UGBA which is my most important class; probably a B or A- in IEOR, and I want an A DAMNIT; P for physics, P for edu196, and I'm not sure what for Film Studies. I hope it'll be an A though!

OH NO I've somehow deleted my labels for "class." This label thing is really stupid. I don't use them and I don't think people who read this do either. LAME AGH.

It's quite dark

I went to sleep at midnight and woke up at 3:30. This is overshooting for my "I want to naturally wake up around 7:30" goal. I really couldn't get back to sleep because I felt fully rested, it was really warm in the room, and the Koreans next door were really loud. Then I just started thinking about all the things I have to do and decided to get out of bed. Of course, the first things I do are

1) E-mail Erica
2) Watch yesterday's episode of Friday Night Lights
3) Check blogs. Surprise, no one has updated since midnight and 3:30 am
4) Write e-mails for club stuff
5) Go through music

So ... I guess some club stuff is taken care of.

You know what I don't get and I'm certain I can change it but I don't know how? I sign into blogger using my yahoo e-mail, which is really my fake e-mail address. But this constantly signs me out of my gmail account and sometimes I'm on both simultaneously and it just completely messes up whatever I'm doing because they just sign me out of both. I've tried changing the primary e-mail for blogger but it claims to not accept gmail accounts which sounds ridiculous because I thought blogger was a part of Google or something like that. Whatever. For now, I will just get used to it.

I would like to turn on the lights of my dorm room and blast some music, but obviously Chrystal is sleeping. I would like to go to the gym but the gym doesn't open until 8. Which is funny because it opens at 6am on weekdays and I'm always like "who the fuck goes to the gym that early?" but I would have already gone by now if I could have. I kind of want to run to the marina but I'm not sure how to get there. I think you just go down University Ave. My floormate is supposedly running to the marina and it will be weird if she saw me. I would feel like a stalker. I also ate way too much yesterday. Damn you crossroads and your delicious grilled stuff and mac&cheese. So tempting. So greasy. So carby.

I'm getting really good at this mouse touchpad thing. I got tired of recharging my batteries for my wireless mouse so I just use the touchpad. Because I'm too cheap to buy a mouse.

Ok. Homework time? I feel so yucky though because I haven't gymmed. The first thing I do every day is gym, so after sitting around for 3 hours (WOW I've been awake 3 hours and it's only 6:30) I feel like a giant lazyass. OOO The sun is rising! Whenever I wake up around dawn, I always want to go outside because I feel like it's such a waste to miss the sunrise. I love dawn. It's why I would want to move to New York. It would be fun to be 3 hours ahead of people and wake up around 5. Although I don't think that happens for auditors.

Mmm... the sun is coming out. I am less inclined to go running now. In fact, I think I'll just climb back into bed...



Apple should come out with more products faster so I can get more music

Things I'd want in my future home

The title is really what this post is about but something more important came up in the 20 seconds after I decided to write a new post.

I FUCKING MISSED FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS.

There are SO FEW shows now that actually have new episodes running, and the programming schedule is completely messed up and the last new episodes are almost never the intended mid-season finales, so I can't tell if there are new episodes coming up or not. Which is why I effing missed Friday Night Lights today. I realized this at 10:20, and the episode would have started at 9pm. ARGH. Ok, yes, I only have to wait until tomorrow morning to watch it, but STILL. WHY was I browsing the internet when there was TV to be watched?! *throws shoe at tv*

Anyway. So I'm back from a week at UCSD. Sunday until Friday. It was fun, but I'm happy to be home and I now realize that stays over 3-4 days are overextended. My eyes hurt because I spent a lot of the break just watching shows online and then playing this beyond addicting game. I finally beat it after about two days of playing. The congratulations screen was not all that rewarding, but I'll take what I can get. I want to find more online games to play. Minesweeper is growing old. Although I'm not sure if getting into games is the best route for the beginning of the new semester.

Oh dang. I realized that I didn't do my monthly "20 Things" at the beginning of January. Although, I haven't ever done it on the first day of the month, so whatever.

I like this song. The video is not great but I'm sure most people will end up watching it anyway. I enjoy quick montages of images when it's well-done (ie. not too fast and ending with some horribly stupid catchphrase that flashes) but they don't even go to the rhythm of the song. Match the song to the pictures when you make a video!

Did you try reading that while simultaneously trying to watch the video? And then did you keep getting distracted by the images of Kristen Bell and Jason Dohring? I know you did.

Ok. Is that enough random thoughts? Most people's posts seem to be about this long, but I haven't even cracked the surface of mine yet.

I went out with Eric, Jackie and Alvin and now it's 3:18am and I will no longer begin this post of "things I'd want in my future home." You guys are all dying to find out, huh? Maybe tomorrow. Tomorrow I will go to the library and see if I can salvage the remains of my brain.

I'm ready to end winter break

I kind of want to go back to Berkeley. My body feels really gross from not exercising in a long time. It's like ... somewhat sore. I have no idea why. Maybe because I haven't stretched out my muscles in a long time. I also have random impulses to fling my body around because it has a lot of pent-up energy in it. I lie around the house a lot and my eyes have gotten worse from Minesweeper.

I also want to go to Rasputin and look for cds. I like Jaymay and The Burnside Project but they're very hard to find on Limewire. :( I really want to find more bands during break, since Limewire seems to work better at home than at Berkeley. But looking for music leads to my playing more minesweeper while I'm waiting for Limewire to perform searches. And then three hours later I'm like "WHOA WHAT happened to my time?!"

Brett Dennen is surprisingly good too. I hope I didn't delete his cd, which I downloaded some time ago.

I would rather put up a video of other songs I like (Jaymay - Sea Green, Sea Blue and The Burnside Project - And So It Goes) but there are none on youtube. Poopie. Although I don't think anyone clicks these.

New Years is tomorrow! I kind of don't want to bother planning anything because I'm kind of lazy and I don't feel like going out to downtown Disney or anything. But then I think about how in a few years, I might not even be able to go out if I wanted to, and this is the time to do anything and everything I think of. I guess it's more memorable when you drive somewhere and celebrate rather than sit at someone's house, which is what we do all the time. Hmm I think I just convinced myself to go to downtown Disney.

Curse of poor eyesight

I decided I would go running today at night. Actually, not really "decided" but "felt like if I didn't exercise, I would go to sleep loathing myself and clutching my fat stomach." So I got ready and walked out and was just passing Greenfield Ave when I heard someone in a car shout something at me. I figured it was some weirdo highschooler so I ignored him and kept walking. And then the car stopped and the person rolled down the window and at this point, I was starting to get freaked out and wondering if anyone would happen to be an eyewitness if I were kidnapped.

Through the music of my iPod, I heard the guy go "hey, Melissa! Melissa!" and I was like "why would a pervert know my name?" but then also wondered if it was some trick. But he made a U-turn and pulled over next to me (facing the wrong way of traffic, too) when I realized it was my cousin. He gave me a ride to the track, but it was dark, so I just went home.

Where I ate an ice cream sandwich and drank hot chocolate and ate cookies. I've noticed that when I fail to exercise, my immediate response is to eat something

Songs I really like right now
1. Jordin Sparks - Tattoo
2. Patrick Park - Something Pretty
3. Patrick Park - Life is a Song
4. The Moldy Peaches - Anyone Else But You (darn you Juno)
5. Cat Power - Sea of Love
6. Mark Ronson - Stop Me
7. Boys Like Girls - Hero/Heroine
8. Jaymay - Sea Green, See Blue
9. Ingrid Michaelson - The Way I Am

My teeth hurt. My dentist seems to think my teeth aren't clean until she makes them bleed.

Ok, kids are cute

I'm freaking bored right now but I'm also too lazy to get up and shower so I was browsing through strangers' blogs and someone had blogged about going to Disneyworld with her kid and there were some pictures and OMG SO CUTE.

Right now I am
Looking at:
Girl seeing Cinderella Castle for the first time. The whole set is actually really cute to look at. And I laughed at the notes on Snow White. If I were a parent, I'd hope to get some pictures like these and frame them. Or maybe by that time, I'll just upload them onto a hologram. (I don't think I've ever used that word so I had to look it up on dictionary.com and I wrote holograph at first before changing it. The definition made absolutely no sense to me. More proof that I'm not really that smart)

Listening to:
Iron and Wine - The Trapeze Swinger

I was watching In Good Company with Johnston yesterday and this was the last song and it was pretty. I didn't even feel like it was nine minutes. I didn't bring my computer back for break, so the only music I have is on my iPod. My little iPod shuffle that contains about 80 songs. I'm hoping I don't grow to hate the songs by January 21st.

Wanting to:
Boo. Danny is leaving for Japan tomorrow so I don't think we will be watching How I Met Your Mother for a long time. We're on second season and Eric and Danny were already laughing super hard at the two weaker episodes of the season. I cannot wait to see their reaction to Slap Bet.

Fun memory notes:
- I'm sad because I don't think I can drink ANYTHING with a drop of alcohol in it without turning red. Johnston made some drinks with Bailey's Irish cream and I still turned red. Tears. I thought fat people could drink MORE alcohol
- Decision to order a tempura ice cream while Danny and Eric ate sushi = best idea ever
- Telling my dad I needed a ride to Danny's while exiting Tasty Garden. "Where is it?" "Over there" *points to street which is literally a block away* "THERE?! You could just walk there!" "Fine I'll walk there then" "No no! I'll give you a ride."
- Getting picked up from Johnston's house by Danny, Eric, Regina and Connie Y. which was the loudest car ride I've had in a long time. Lots of screaming. Lots of yelling. Mostly Danny going "LIAR! LIAR!" to Connie and me going "FUCKER! FUCK YOU!" to Danny.
- Danny driving down Michilinda, apparently so we could look at Christmas lights but most of us didn't know where we were headed. So that lead to "Danny ... where are we going?" "To look at Christmas lights!" "WHAT?! I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO IN N OUT. WTF"
- Danny stopping on a hill to look at the LA city lights. Him and Eric were sitting in the front quietly while the girls were talking in the back when Danny was like "WTF. Why are the guys looking at Christmas lights and the girls just talking?!"
- In N Out. Enough said.

I'm not in this picture. Because I don't wish to be stalked. HA. Actually I'm sure I've given enough information to be found by a complete stranger.