Where is this coming from?

I normally get PMS seven days before I actually get my period. It's marked by sudden annoyance at people, crazy cravings for ice cream or frosting, and bloating that drives me insane. I think my period ended last week. So I wonder, where is my sudden bitchiness coming from?! I have no clue. But I know where my fatness is coming from - eating freaking half of a large of a Little Star Pizza last night. To give you perspective, Eric, Alvin, Jackie, Connie, and I (that's FIVE people) shared a single large and we were all satisfyingly full after. I shared a large with only Alvin yesterday, and I ate TWICE that amount. I don't know why I do these things to myself. It's like self-masochism.

I kind of went to bed knowing I'd wake up feeling very terrible about myself. I was not only "pretty happy" with my stomach last week, I was actually like WOW this is where I would want to be if I couldn't actually be toned! And it lasted several days so when I woke up today and saw how far I had fallen, I was like OH MY GOD. I honestly believe that it took me six weeks of eating very little to get me to that place, and I destroyed it with the last three days. I'd like to delete what I just wrote because while I am fairly honest about all my thoughts when I blog, I think this is getting a little too honest with my body image. I guess I'll write what I really think in my microsoft word diary later.

Damn it, I have to run to class now. Apparently the most important thing you could have for school besides a computer and a printer is a freaking stapler. I always used Chrystal's and now I can't. Life is a lot more difficult when you can't staple papers together yourself.